![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWjVpM28yZE85ZzBnNTdnbFBvQ1p5Z1hKbnlNY29yc0sxeTJ4MzdHM3BtSFE0WEc2RW5ldGl4U3BDeHVYbTJTRHluVTdwT09taFQ1eTZXZjZyeDgxa1lmc3NsbFFsaE5iUDBQVDdqMUFTd1NOaEFCaWZIOTllQUxHV3JiZmgxd2tBPT0%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(e5aa8d88866c0d018c4157afcb79945d).jpg)
“Don’t take life too seriously, nobody gets out alive anyway.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMd3VsS1kvcHdzSWc1Mk10cW5RejUvMmpFSFAvS2pzdDZWSER2QkxTK0ZjckhhRlBaK1pkQ2VuLzhzRGd0bFhJWlZ1TlpBWFVGMTQ5dUdYN3Y5anlDaDZLWWVTdEg4amxUK0JPQ3lOcFQ3TzA%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(abb94f140922fed5b6d26aef40383a1c).jpg)
“I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy saving mode.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMNkFDTWZlVDZ0UFdiRFBnS3VFai9SSVJhSXQxcFVRbUVHbmhaWXVYR0F1N2c2V01XcUxJYUpxTXVHSURXdkl2SGVxVThSSHo3TTBKUndzVXpRR3grVTd3ZVpRZmVJcGx6dXVsaWFZOUowTFVzTGdIRllrNU0velNibTlEYi9wOTFNc1BKZURSVWNtdnVERkNzVTFSWEhZPQ%3D%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(37cbb6599ce2b4ea5f829c6808742fc1).jpg)
“Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy chocolate, which is pretty much the same thing.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMd3VsS1kvcHdzSWc1Mk10cW5RejUvMzlmZ2QxWEFOUWh6UVp6OXBEcllZQ2g5VDNXdW1YTFNYTWNjSEtCc3YwVS8wQWJ1VVhpZDdtSFRvcHI4YUNLOW5FaFN1d251ZTdFaXg5R0VXeDJtRGk%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(8694488eedcb2856946e1e509a0a5893).jpg)
“I’m not clumsy, I’m just allergic to gravity.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMd3VsS1kvcHdzSWc1Mk10cW5RejUvMkd6UFg1eUE5ZEQ5bnovSVoxY2lpTXZOYXNGVlJiNjFsOGpIR2Nkcmh3WGk5VEJrbnhaNS85MnV6YXdrdWZ1dG9PeHUydDIwdlNvR2Nhd2pmRlBoNzA%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(396d1cce683b3c6958822b875c736c0c).jpg)
“I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMd3VsS1kvcHdzSWc1Mk10cW5RejUvMU1BSUdidS9XRHlEOWg1T2FwTmppZ1pMU3hscHF3bFJ3dmN6L1ByYWhldWgrTjhnUklORkU5aHFsN2E5eVJld1pIUGd0TDRWZEc3dCtoTWcrZGZZSCtjaCtVbmxROUp2UUprUmZEV1hSSVpMTHZUVS92SHZRQm8rTkFFSVBlWkZPaDd2RVFrN2xTWk1hWlUrYXdLZU1xYXpKbnZ3cmhmbnJReGdERVlyczk1QT09/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(26f2807548879f8db50a6c32134fb01d).jpg)
“I’m not saying I’m Batman, I’m just saying nobody has ever seen me and Batman in the same room together.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMFhJaXE4dEIrRUpVMWpZOU1NYUpGSDFTSCs5a2hYMUNaRHJmak05NU1MTTliNUZpKzRkVzY4aHZTU1NmVGpPMWVUeGJaWVpGZHRvMG9lTGRoMEpIQUcwMHNDd2ZxWDZHYkQyWjNQVHFFVjFieUFmcXJrU3BJTitrQmVwN04yeElnPT0%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(5139a847e8c77bfff13af16299a214d9).jpg)
“My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdML0toRmdDRVl1NjNBVitXdU4xa21HU25jZ1IzdDRPNXpmQnFFWmoxMlJURHRJdDJMMFU4Q0xna1lzYUtIL09zTDI2UTlpbnBXSGZRUTByaCtzb1U5V0g2L0RwYW9UUkJEL2JQV2ZwT2NZMnJocjJxNGxvODhWMTBvUkxQOStvV1pRPT0%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(5ea3a42238fef0a899fb427ad524d37d).jpg)
“I don’t need anger management, I just need people to stop pissing me off.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMOW42eElEaUZtckVwTzZNc1dSNENJdjR1OUFrU1ZTTEhFWlpPVDk2aVBwTVB0cmo2bVNyU0NFbGtUYm1pb29rMTMvc1cyeTdCZ3hPOS9UaE50b3hNR3c9/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(61924941b34a2f3247f6bab0fe53fe03).jpg)
“I put the ‘pro’ in procrastinate.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMd3VsS1kvcHdzSWc1Mk10cW5RejUvMWlwK25rbGtCYWJoV3lxNWVrbWZyQktSdnE1RHduc3FyUk1rNWNIZW9rZUdGZDRKV0o1Z1JMZHJSMUNQV05pdGVMYzJHVHZJZGZMV213TndLUDUyT0tQUExBNkdjSXZwV1BPQ0dqL2p0NFpRPT0%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(c68900e867452db495b854adc826bb25).jpg)
“I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdML0toRmdDRVl1NjNBVitXdU4xa21HVGxmTXVsck1iVmc5ZFlyTk55U2w3SDYrNmdFc1dwVTlVRnlvVHR0VXd0Z0ZxS3ppTGVxM3hBQ3dXN1AvSGFmU1NERSszRkVGajZxc3lqNHZxVnRHbmw%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(4fd83895f07dbc1a323b1aee92cd72a1).jpg)
“I don’t sweat, I sparkle.” CHOCOLATE LOVE QUOTES
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMd3VsS1kvcHdzSWc1Mk10cW5RejUvMlJIaVVrRVBTK0pmcE1Fb0c1UnlhTkhVY0l2UlRpeEtiRWpyZmhQS3JGRVdjQ1dBQWx5MU02SDJIYUVOYlZyaU09/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(e964b30f9000f3ba6c66e23a73ec6574).jpg)
“I’m not short, I’m fun-sized.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdML0toRmdDRVl1NjNBVitXdU4xa21HUkFSZVJPSEM1TFVBNWZ3VlJFS2VGSlJ1dDVmR2NwVzBTYkt0TmFsOHM1UUd2SkhDaVZNUFFtWDhTQVkvdjd1djBYVXNOK3NIYlhFSkFwM1RpWGhyUFA%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(cd175e9ea86e909e06ba8ecf590c5831).jpg)
“I don’t have a dirty mind, I have a sexy imagination.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMd3VsS1kvcHdzSWc1Mk10cW5RejUvMUJ3a1VyQ3hqRDBDVi9lakN0U05GZHJ2OWxpekRqR3pxbDRMRVdLdk93QTRCRjh3Ums2QmdQWWNCdmp1Wk5ldkQxdDBvdXRsNkV4RWZRbGErTHNHeDdLWVVQcG9wcHhUVktCeTNTd0NOakhBPT0%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(4e277d2078d400810b6d073f857670a2).jpg)
“I’m not a stalker, I’m just an unpaid private investigator.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMd0MraWtpWUZlSVd4WFJ1a2M0L1dvSUx0eEd0cDJva1o5K0c2OXVzaitoKzg5VDgvYm5xLzE4YTBQT0NtUUJzdHdVQTRWY2kzUXc2RDNJaEdZNU5nOHpxSWVuR2c3SXExY3htWHFKMURQYkltajh1NkFpdlFUbGJnV1IrMmc5WERtM3krZFZtVDN1WlRjNGZ0WkZVN0pzPQ%3D%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(55e98d634c800c1374a2012342701b4e).jpg)
“My housekeeping style is best described as ‘There appears to have been a struggle.'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdML0toRmdDRVl1NjNBVitXdU4xa21HU1ZIRzVwL2p5RHVGTzhMbFEwMXRTS09uZlBFTzZQdXZTVjNuS1RucXQxQmFBSEhUbE9VWlJRZHU1Y2NVdjJtVWF4TVBFUmtSVkY4Yk5sbExFbVE4UFhuVlFnY3duSzhTOFYwd0ZGOUt5ZGMyZnJ6UXg3anJHL2JVK0pjYksvdmdNPQ%3D%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(4a07751bddd84d199ead77251bd07066).jpg)
“I don’t need a hairstylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMd3VsS1kvcHdzSWc1Mk10cW5RejUvMnQyZzNrR1VOVTRzV1NhaEZGTVUxRHFyVmNkczlWVGlDbVNtcHN4WEdDNkpGM2xlbDJ3NkQwNWtBTy9Vc3o2bXRTdnVJNEJHZG4zN3h1MVRXT2pxSnRCY1V2Vk03cm1tYjBQV2RDWHhNcDlDRk55MDZlYUFGQ0w4MkJOV2pUaWtjPQ%3D%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(f17b2bb725218906b1c254c310110f66).jpg)
“I’m not shy, I’m just good at figuring out who’s worth talking to.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdML0toRmdDRVl1NjNBVitXdU4xa21HU3JJSDNFWFVZaW9HZ01ybCs1bjAyb3puS0Y1ZDNOcFJQa0tiOEM5OXRqZkVTNlJZWXE2N05sZFVnY1ArMXNDSnNtTnpsVlFhV0lidW5VdDJYY2NmUWFmRWRTVzNKemE1Qm9pMDAzNWQ3U1F5eFhsQmRyWTMvZDN4dklvWEtHc1p3PQ%3D%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(33d1c326677ebbba5d73b35de54d87cd).jpg)
“I don’t have a beer belly, I have a protective covering for my rock-hard abs.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMd3VsS1kvcHdzSWc1Mk10cW5RejUvMGZvaGtDUFk4MDJSazBRQ0FVV1dDc0pWd21oQ2Zqc2U3MEhxenZnbUxuYjkwN2YwSmRLWHVaai84Q0RlRUpTMy9yKzJVY2lrRFhwa25FeEFEeEhYbUw%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(51b92302000f8a674fdca051484a54a9).jpg)
“I’m not aging, I’m just becoming a classic.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMd3VsS1kvcHdzSWc1Mk10cW5RejUvMndjbXlJUEtuR3c5eDZqa3lwWUxzbUg5bTlwMTFtN0JJTVNBOFdTeEEwSklUUFR5cmJXMTJDMnp3SzJZRklRQnd3Q3BLc3NZeDNTdWN4ZHhVU2hUTGI%3D/BITE+FUNNY+QUOTES/(0084fe01dba5e3283ae2431569171f0c).jpg)
“I’m not crazy, my reality is just different from yours.”