![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVGJ3NWhSeWdFUTdsdjczWmFrRThPNXZuaW1NYU1zQXBVYjlZY0JzMWF5ZmVxWGFuN1FyRWwza2NWaTI4QndQcEwrWGdJMUJRT05kcnlFNVNveStiTmJzTUVmbE42RjBKTkg0UTBVMFFMc3hVS2dOY2lMUHd3UTZLblB3ME5PamN3bFNrbHdXd0xUKzFaTzVXNVp3YWxJPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(c58befbd4bf5df080843fc9fbf0032fa).jpg)
“I asked my dog what’s his favorite kind of music, and he said ‘Bark and Roll!'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrYzhmT21XRjNldEN4VW1iQmNJWjlkR29hS3J1Y1JGZ3RUMzdncDF6TXhIYmUxNzZxM0ltajE1anh0NDdUYVdNN09yMncvQjdwTVVRWExLbkZsRnJaTm9TQmdKQWxPSzZHdFk3bEcrakFLbko3MzRTdWo2ZThFMDhFOHVidmJLK2NFcVcrL0toMFc5eVpkOUE3cE1oUm44PQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(d42240997da868a54a1cd948e358a22a).jpg)
“I saw a squirrel running in circles today. It was probably just trying to find its nuts.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUWx2bjk0TytUTGd1VkVuY0N6QnAveXA2eUJlWGoxMVRuV2w4cWpva3Y1cGhKYTkzd3BXL3g1TTVCcG04U0VLNlVVa01vaUthNGNjZ1A5SjZNbXR5UFBUVlo1dEltNnQwdGJUd2kvNTVIVUg3S0huVUdOTEdtMzNoU0RCSzluR2FRPT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(e5794edf280bcf872ebd0143af2dd27e).jpg)
“Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVHlVY050bXgvb011QUJ3RHBDVFVTL0taU0ppbVY4aVdCbzFIQ1ZwZ3RFc2xUcm1YOHh2SjZqdmJ0Y0hpbVdYdXEyRDNENysxYTN3MExGb0VLRWtmY0ZiMWsrY0l4bVZNM1Yvdkh6aStha3hnaUJNK2NnMEd3WFk5cEVRbGV3NDQ1d1hNU1VDUDNpNllGbHF6T2FuWHlGOTJJSkE0cFNLS1Z1ZDFkQU53dklSTUFvYkFHeERURitrK1crZnRlUWRrY0dMaTNXbE5EYmNCcFIzUmhIQk4rVT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(31f8b2e30e69ed613280abe9df0ae6b6).jpg)
“I adopted a cat recently. I named her ‘Karma’ because every time I try to get some work done, she shows up to bite me.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRTblU1OUpvbUpoSTFnUEo5NEgrNzJwTStFd28weFBDcmJrT2djUlF3a2lpdHpKTXhjMDBrclcvSkc1a0VaVzIyblNGMnM3bnpCODJHbTduRFp5RUNCeTNMYUZrdzBXcDhBandVV09zMEM5aVRvM0dRM1R3cVNYL285ZmVyb2RnPT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(2da104f95ab3bfaffd1287af1965f329).jpg)
“Why did the bee wear suspenders? Because its pants kept falling down!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUWx2bjk0TytUTGd1VkVuY0N6QnAveXgyWHlpVjUwdkpCRXJpcjRGYUkrZjFwTERienFmMHBGVjhja1JhaElCV2xWeU56bHh3VjJ2WTZMRi9Sc1BieHRBeFMyNm1zYXB4QXFXdWphSFVFMFNFTjJtNFk3L1c4T0x5QU4xeEpRWnRRPT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(b780573015c41cc78c2f3ab94d5de6b1).jpg)
“Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWnM2dkJoUThLTUlRbTRqNnRQMm5QSEo1YlVuWVhpVnV2RUluRGt0cjZ5Y21iaExzUmRaZnNCWnhqOHlRNzFhK2c1TlZ5TTlDZmQ0NHJXcWI0OEhLRXRYSTIyVVBVOTQ4M0lvZVBBc01VN3l3TnNVazk5VHJkRlNNbHY4a2FzVlhBWjRtREM5VmgwMU9FTFFZaDdUQkhJPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(e7acf0a32ad28db6b9aae50200d9a71e).jpg)
“Did you hear about the snail who wrote a book about fast cars? It was a real escargot!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWnhmY2ZFd2lvRWNHcllFL3FWU1pJc2ZPejJ3Z2lsU0ZmRStyS01LeVlMenFtTDdzUXAwZ0hPVU1oZEFXUnpOc3FiN1BaTnhoSW5ZTGVhc01WcWpxSXM9/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(119389ca29a07ab74b28cf0b0ad7d0eb).jpg)
“What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrYisrRXl6TkNtcGljOCt4SjlKaGVMUnBWUW45REtnZi9pRmN1ajRaenRUVHhSc3grSTBoMXJhckNNaEc1UU0rSEt3cTVPM1AzSGFieXJDTk5ZUzlBY1E9/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(471f6f8ea9a44a6a90601077a0fd0ae3).jpg)
“I tried to catch some fog yesterday, but I mist.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWnhmY2ZFd2lvRWNHcllFL3FWU1pJdmdBMFpTSTJ3NCthRlMvVzl1OVBISFV5ZFBENEd3UjVlb3NpcTlKZStENXlvbjd5NXFMUEhEcTRqT2dPUnppRVlkYnZDTWxQaFlzSlQ0eVZnajd2Zno5L3NFdHovQW14SElxYXdPc2ZYemR3PT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(91c8282b41d5ff52fa4042480810215e).jpg)
“What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRTblU1OUpvbUpoSTFnUEo5NEgrNmlIelpYTXlBWE1JRjFiS1dWb1dHOURhYW40dXRXS1pvQWdqQ0lSOXZuYXBTaUk5bE82M3ZpRm9QeHcyY0lGSHY5WXZoWVAvVkgwM0YrUU5oZFdZam1yMDd4MG9iYnpyOTQ4WnB5WlcyVnJWdnNNaHUwTSs1cm92d1N4dm8wdHRrPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(23781c78269c0a2ad6cba7a640bc2fe4).jpg)
“Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!” FUNNY QUOTES TO MY HUSBAND
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUkVBOExIaHdySHM2eVFNWjBCQTBteVFFTkhTOXh2ZDdENlFjUExYR3NaZWhRaGpBeWxwRXlOd0xkS0xPb3ViMlo4RWcxNHRtazJPdCtBMFNmZzRQWjNiN2tZT3d3S05RRk1EN3JaYk45Smg%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(55f25e45273ea4641a3d3795c2f9c095).jpg)
“I used to be a baker until I realized I kneaded dough.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUWx2bjk0TytUTGd1VkVuY0N6QnAvemR4STlHd1ROWFhHb1ExNmlDcDdnNnRSTTN6WlVRYy9iUjQ0SEdqMzBLMmxIN21LNFE0T2kvVmZmeFJWWUxPWTNKejlUTVJqVFROQmlTUk5OWkgyTnQzdU1BbEltTlZnem1hL1g1UlJpNkNBPT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(e04d40ca85122150f51ac9852bb0a088).jpg)
“Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRTblU1OUpvbUpoSTFnUEo5NEgrNlMzazlCWFJnanhRajlKK3FyTkNjdndZaExyWnVoSHRSNkZxMmNsRmlEeWNUU2Y0aTFYdW81Nk1reUVxYUpqSkxaTUltcDFmbTVLOFNCSWN5U3hPSUNJK0hkbzhMQzhXK2JuRTRhZWZCSEV3PT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(e548d95f21dd90d83f7893a403ff3ad0).jpg)
“Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrY0RUVGtBb3UxdmpSa2dnNVgwQUVCOEpmQmZnSDZEY2dXVGloVFRMZitxSHRnMXhyOXNocVJZVkdXenpjNVNVajBZMU5aRS9wK0hKa3pUUVUvQUhjTGZYYkk2OFBTbjYyWkV4UHpSU2JVUXlKT1RDNnVvTmdBdmprMmMvZ0JYaythVUFvZ2E2YlE0UnVQNjJIWmUyRi80PQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(8394482658eda040d01bf97f5bf2e911).jpg)
“Why wouldn’t the shrimp share its treasure? Because it was a little shellfish!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUWx2bjk0TytUTGd1VkVuY0N6QnAveXA2eUJlWGoxMVRuV2w4cWpva3Y1cGhKYTkzd3BXL3g1TTVCcG04U0VLNlVVa01vaUthNGNjZ1A5SjZNbXR5UFBUVlo1dEltNnQwdGJUd2kvNTVIVUg3S0huVUdOTEdtMzNoU0RCSzluR2FRPT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(e5794edf280bcf872ebd0143af2dd27e).jpg)
“Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRTblU1OUpvbUpoSTFnUEo5NEgrNGwzdlE1SGxpUkdNeVRFZDlnVXN6S21PU09Pa1BDb2QyK2lRK2lvZjdTRHlPTXNqUVJuYmtONEtheGIxMHlRV1JiU0JIQ1RrNFBHNlV6SXRad2syYmg%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(7f4cc8cd846ba9ebd5e5639748a6a7dc).jpg)
“Why did the chicken go to the seance? To talk to the other side!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZG1jek8wTUo2V2dnK1Yzd3RDMjArcXViRkFPb1JiSUUzZmVES3pYZDdFTFNMajlRdWkwcUxsc3BQN05YdVdwbFBHRnkyU2FSa3JReU5CUk5wUC9aeXIxaXNuNkdWSW5QaW5PVTBGc0RIaEZTTjZNOFZoc0cwdmx2MlRSRGtYZ2dDeGg4Y0N2R2R1aGJRMkN2dVdIMEdBPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(cef09fb8ab7e2193c4f399773e54e885).jpg)
“Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWnM2dkJoUThLTUlRbTRqNnRQMm5QRXZJNUFnUS93d2taWHhmd0hIU0FsVDJieGp6SHV1WXBnUUlyc0pzQWVPWTRPU0ZRQzVPRFlOTEpTblVRTnBzUytqQiszZWYyQjBacHM1YU03dnVoWEZJSldEWEYrRUFMcEtxVWdPaElKd0E1OGltM0lPc1UwNDBYSXFSQnlNekVvPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(52cd9807f102da100ad919c8dd86af44).jpg)
“Did you hear about the monkey who passed his driving test? He’s bananas about driving!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUWx2bjk0TytUTGd1VkVuY0N6QnAvd3JFWE9zWmZFMFRRTGxQTGlVTWEwL0dqUGY0VnBiWHgwVHRnQy9SQmN5aEw0WHhRaExpemdGS05xZWpMbXc4WWMrVmloL1p5SElZUUthODFPNVZXNHlVelFDYkxoT0Q1VWZRempWTms4d0ZRPT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+ANIMALS/(bbe65315a7cd81a3463ac4926fc5e583).jpg)
“Why don’t ants ever get sick? Because they have little anty-bodies!”