![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVitycWlwejQ3YzlTRlF0azJ6WWd2UmY2REFTM2p1L2U5VjlUK1QvVDZldUR2bE9PQWZTVzlQL0x5MU9Da2xraVNNR1ZtVEJGdHM0TWNUcHpQM01mQTYxMnZ5S2d5T21NZ0VrNS9ITU5id3JXeWR6NythVkhubmRMVWd2c3NkcERnPT0%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(46514b888899f5126dea086c8fe158a1).jpg)
“I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRsSmdicVhEWHF6UDlJY2tUNkw5NEJHcldXb2hZMzh0c3JxUVNETk5NaWVrR1VueFBXNFE3bEpEU0VjcWMrdzBLbTBXYnJSMXJ5WG5uL092Sy84WXVEV012U1hUWnhUODFTZTRGa2ppejRkRFVKMFhla1h5YzZmSWhaM09ZMUdnPT0%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(47bef052abafa766e41bb7d7b272047a).jpg)
“I went to buy some camouflage trousers but couldn’t find the store.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUWx2bjk0TytUTGd1VkVuY0N6QnAvemR4STlHd1ROWFhHb1ExNmlDcDdnNnRSTTN6WlVRYy9iUjQ0SEdqMzBLMmxIN21LNFE0T2kvVmZmeFJWWUxPWTNKejlUTVJqVFROQmlTUk5OWkgyTnR0U0ZzWmlHcVJPZEg3ZG8vUlBZNStRPT0%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(8666a970d2c854419dc2542fd17061de).jpg)
“Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrV3dXc0gxMG1lcDNaNG5SeVdETlVEVlhqSmxFdjN1Uldpd0NUNW9ETVFQY1RRWCtrZUVmUEJzdVpSTHdpSWNJWmJkZG0rRWZYTzhzNnVPeDBZWkNjU0dLd2ZzTnVtMXJUTUU5YnJtSVB1QXRjV3l5aFFpTytQWWtXWEZPd0thd0RJei9MaFRHVG1DWWJpbTRhd3ZoWGxlcHJiTi9XOGo1N2hqUHBXVWI3QXMy/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(9d5a115a0c5719aaf6283779d5966b68).jpg)
“I asked the librarian if she had any books on paranoia. She whispered, ‘They’re right behind you.'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUkVBOExIaHdySHM2eVFNWjBCQTBteE5ScjNva3dTWVE4ZHVXVWorN3RTQ3ZuUVl2ZUdyTTZaWmRKeUdyT1ExN0FLazBIUThQNEk0QkVLdDR1ZVJ4Mk1RYzJFdGpNYWJXNEdCcENUb2pFSWk%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(141793095aabe700dba211f76895fad1).jpg)
“I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUWx2bjk0TytUTGd1VkVuY0N6QnAveXA2eUJlWGoxMVRuV2w4cWpva3Y1cGhKYTkzd3BXL3g1TTVCcG04U0VLNlVVa01vaUthNGNjZ1A5SjZNbXR5UFBUVlo1dEltNnQwdGJUd2kvNTVIVUg3S0huVUdOTEdtMzNoU0RCSzluR2FRPT0%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(e5794edf280bcf872ebd0143af2dd27e).jpg)
“Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrYisrRXl6TkNtcGljOCt4SjlKaGVMUnBWUW45REtnZi9pRmN1ajRaenRUVDVicStDMFhibG9ic0IzOCtsY3Fta08yaSt2UWpnd3JlamxldzVyVm11SWM9/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(2b429e297dbdb029a787e5b0831894a7).jpg)
“I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUk1MQ1BCSmdleFRTK3VFRTJWUjZMS0FsVkRxTnoySnpMN1RmeGFMS3lYS3BkN0dRUStTQVdOdlZZdjdIZjEwQzhTNm4wZWxzRFpnYWF5aStNMmlpc1pzajBLb1drcWJRc2FscWw4T0FOa09XNnFwVWR3WHd6Y3pUcU41WklJcm1QZVZPL3cxdTBrS0podGVMZi9kS0VFPQ%3D%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(962deec8a67a1b4ae5e5c882fe14c16a).jpg)
“The future, the present, and the past walked into a bar. Things got a little tense.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVTcveW4vYWV3S0VXbnpsUTNJZ0tmTm9NeldWK0ZUYm83bG5WOVlLQXN6dTlCNnhGMjhOWjRsczBzWDNIZWNab0IwdTB5a2J5UU5jekNvdWRibUd1NUV1QlpOazhkNnhGVkUwTUtwdWJYTlBpdU9tdTBMSk80RTI0TFZ2bWF2eWJrZmV1cC9GOEt5M1J2OGlWUFRpT2QrcEY5VzEzdFFvTWpBMm5ZcCtpQm4yVDdwQnRZbVhpQ1ZxRENOQjMvaXNEdz09/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(6acbbf589687b3f732d5971427a4b9dc).jpg)
“I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I’ve been tripping all day.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWWU2VFFPaFYxOXVlMjZLK1ZSN0UvWTA1Nm9iY0p6L1ZkcmsvNnJ2WjJNUTJ2V2d4WTdLN3hxUkdDZXdGTE5ZelY4TnVLd3ZmZFNrQlV0QlFreHl6WnlmTnNubmNjeTZ1NW8wL1cwdjEzK0g%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(cf2e429982449b20da2e2c7ce0c540d8).jpg)
“I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then, it hit me.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVVJkc0FkQlV3cEpxK2lSbjgyeXZFelVwUmVpcHFqdFQ0VkhpbGlvWkdlRk83RENramRNMGNXV3ZxU1oxRko5OUNRZDhNT2tQNVdHZ0h2Umk3eUt2TUJla1BrQVFWdXptSHpNd2IvQ2hBMTU%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(d68c3d7e410891db450ffd70ffdc4690).jpg)
“I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She hugged me.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUkVBOExIaHdySHM2eVFNWjBCQTBtd3JXV0xMeTVVaU9HcHZ6YXFPTUVxSmszUFVIYmVnV2JWa2NPTUJWeG1qMDh6bk1JR2p6VDlyTXRqOGk5VjFOZ3F3dFdndmpWY3JtNEk4T3BxamplbFQ%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(0545aab45d586c9c6214119939dd0350).jpg)
“I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole-destroying.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrYVZ6RXV4ekxoMWtDdjVMUG1XN0JUTVk0aHZKcG96QlRCU2I5YUQyV2tSNE92dUlWWTZyajJ2ODZ5K21yUm56ZGIwYnFyUk9hZWNxVzA1SWhCaTRLbERZdWxTQjVkYm9udVVLU1dobUMvL1h4KzVkRnNFK0xkcFh5YWVFV3JxWVhRPT0%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(89b176e04b9cb449d6918bb044f973b8).jpg)
“I once ate a watch. It was time-consuming.” WORKING TOGETHER AS A FAMILY QUOTES
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUkVBOExIaHdySHM2eVFNWjBCQTBteE5ScjNva3dTWVE4ZHVXVWorN3RTQ3ZuUVl2ZUdyTTZaWmRKeUdyT1ExN0FLazBIUThQNEk0QkVLdDR1ZVJ4Mk1RYzJFdGpNYWJXNEdCcENUb2pFSWk%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(141793095aabe700dba211f76895fad1).jpg)
“I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUWx2bjk0TytUTGd1VkVuY0N6QnAveFhJUlpYVXJsVDBlSjBMTGdzNkZPdTYvcnZXOHJqL3NNMWtUcmxOUXR5NWhGc1ZyaFppL2hJVzR6OHBldDBYOVdEVGh5cDNSaGVOWWhwenhiV3l2WU1hWk5xamQ0NUdUMjgxQjlrQXdpenJUbjJYSXdCNWc3eXY0Ykt0d01RTHd3PQ%3D%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(797f0116648b8224351db85780532c77).jpg)
“Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVVJkc0FkQlV3cEpxK2lSbjgyeXZFeHVIelJ4blF3K1hQbkNtcmcxeWlWMzByNlRnZXU1by8vbjVMYkJ5Vko5aEtrM2orcEFKbkNYNG1RZ3Y1UE44WTI5K3JmSGJxWXgrZEdDU2xmdC9TY2pPRDJxYnpJcFpJa29WMUNhNnJaSTZ3PT0%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(c0c5b83558d54af564caac45e144f4a7).jpg)
“I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRsSmdicVhEWHF6UDlJY2tUNkw5NXdYMXBRTktyVVZsVDNhSm1sOVBkNmxSbjQ0eVU3b2sxVUtmMXBlMUR1dm12MDBXc3k1dUMwYmYyOURqQmUzejJhVlMzQWIrNmRYcVlrRDlDOGRLQ0dqczcvcUpVTExBUWVXY2d3d2dXUnNwVGdOTEdjSlhQQ2F5dTdMNW1MOEYwPQ%3D%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(53e3e09f584a8e29db24ac5b77246677).jpg)
“I went to the doctor because I was seeing double. Turns out I just had two drinks!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVTcveW4vYWV3S0VXbnpsUTNJZ0tmT1J6d1JHbUV6bWQ2bG9mbEVRUlhNYnJEUFJiMG0xRGM4b0hxRlFTTHhrWWtqbDluby90SWRiaWRZQzE3SzBNd1NqYmdDcXdBYi96WUdFVW5qYUkxTG5iVTNEdDRYY3BTRTJTTW91TXp1aXFoS1pJZnI5N0hWbWNpeWVZZ085TC9nQnJmdERURE80NitCbG5UaUo1REliMmFlQzI1LzVzZDdsQ0VHUGJ0YWprcEkrL2NENWJWSEZWYjB2SVcvVTVVMD0%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(bcd4be2ad360a901e98ab7bdf8d9bcc5).jpg)
“I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money. He just stands there applauding and saying, ‘Ooh, I love how smooth it is!'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZG1jek8wTUo2V2dnK1Yzd3RDMjArck9naE8vZHZvdUh1T0prWWlZaEhaK205U0tUZjROUzBSVUxHOEtqSm13eUFvNExGK2FrMGtyMkVWeFlaU0lhSU9uZzlMVDdsS1NrTjRveEo0eHg3b1NRVVdrV2crYnRFbXZHTk5CUXhLVlFnPT0%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(715bfc8995f700547098d9bbf8b778c9).jpg)
“Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrYisrRXl6TkNtcGljOCt4SjlKaGVMUnBWUW45REtnZi9pRmN1ajRaenRUVDVicStDMFhibG9ic0IzOCtsY3Fta08yaSt2UWpnd3JlamxldzVyVm11SWM9/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(2b429e297dbdb029a787e5b0831894a7).jpg)
“I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVVJkc0FkQlV3cEpxK2lSbjgyeXZFelVwUmVpcHFqdFQ0VkhpbGlvWkdlRk83RENramRNMGNXV3ZxU1oxRko5OUNRZDhNT2tQNVdHZ0h2Umk3eUt2TUJla1BrQVFWdXptSHpNd2IvQ2hBMTU%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(d68c3d7e410891db450ffd70ffdc4690).jpg)
“I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She hugged me.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUkVBOExIaHdySHM2eVFNWjBCQTBteDJhemJud1hsa1JjY0tuUW56QkR1UDl0Y2x1eW9PNFVnQ1ZTREhXanJhU1QrTzRocUpiWS9sTmpCYkkzUWxJcGRuenRsdlUyYXlpMUpLM0k2MlIwbnQ%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(cb04f8ff2e81139e65f8aba24e855f45).jpg)
“I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUkVBOExIaHdySHM2eVFNWjBCQTBteE5ScjNva3dTWVE4ZHVXVWorN3RTQ3ZuUVl2ZUdyTTZaWmRKeUdyT1ExN0FLazBIUThQNEk0QkVLdDR1ZVJ4Mk1RYzJFdGpNYWJXNEdCcENUb2pFSWk%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(141793095aabe700dba211f76895fad1).jpg)
“I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRsSmdicVhEWHF6UDlJY2tUNkw5NXdYMXBRTktyVVZsVDNhSm1sOVBkNmxSbjQ0eVU3b2sxVUtmMXBlMUR1dm12MDBXc3k1dUMwYmYyOURqQmUzejJhVlMzQWIrNmRYcVlrRDlDOGRLQ0dqczcvcUpVTExBUWVXY2d3d2dXUnNwVGdOTEdjSlhQQ2F5dTdMNW1MOEYwPQ%3D%3D/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(53e3e09f584a8e29db24ac5b77246677).jpg)
“I went to the doctor because I was seeing double. Turns out I just had two drinks!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWnhmY2ZFd2lvRWNHcllFL3FWU1pJc2ZPejJ3Z2lsU0ZmRStyS01LeVlMenFtTDdzUXAwZ0hPVU1oZEFXUnpOc3FiN1BaTnhoSW5ZTGVhc01WcWpxSXM9/QUOTES+THAT+MAKE+NO+SENSE+BUT+ARE+FUNNY/(119389ca29a07ab74b28cf0b0ad7d0eb).jpg)
“What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.”