FUNNY CAR QUOTES

“Did you hear about the car that broke down? It was tire-d!”

“I’m not a great driver, I’m an excellent parker!”

“I don’t run from my problems, I prefer to drive away from them.”

“Driving a car is like riding a bicycle, except the bicycle bursts into flames when you crash.”

“I’m not reckless, I just like to press my luck while the brakes work.”

“I used to have a fear of speed bumps, but I got over it.”

“If everything seems to be going well, you’ve obviously overlooked something.”

“Why did the car bring a coat to the mechanic? It heard it might need a radiator cap!”

“The road to success is always under construction.”

“I’m not speeding, I’m qualifying for the Daytona 500!”

“Why did the car go to therapy? It had a lot of emotional baggage!”

“I brake for unicorns” QUOTES ABOUT BEING IN LOVE AND HAPPY

“I wish my car could refill itself like my bank account does.”

“Why did the car become a singer? It always wanted to take the highway to the danger zone!”

“My car’s gas gauge is like my bank account – it only reminds me I’m running on empty.”

“I’ve tried jogging, but I just can’t keep the ice cream truck in sight.”

“The car may not be fast, but my hair definitely is when the window’s down.”

“I don’t make mistakes while driving, I just have unexpected pit stops.”

“You know you’re a true car enthusiast when you use ‘horsepower’ as a unit of measurement for your vacuum cleaner.”

“Why did the car join the baseball team? It wanted to be a home run hitter!”

“I bought a car with a swimming pool in the back seat – turns out it was just a sunroof leak.”

“My car and I have a lot in common – we both make a lot of noise, and we’re not as quick as we used to be!”