![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVnFvS05nZ2N0NlhJZVBLdTUvV0M3OEo1ZlBVajJpUkdvdEZxcDFvaFNNNnJkTmFUTmYyTHFBZFNJbllUVWluS0RnN3BYbEZpZ0dlNGhqSVBaSlNONUtjRFRQWHlndU1PRkU0NnhEdU9iclM4cnJxaTA2MzVHWlF3Qm5ua1JpVGZsRGNlckNRSktPUWxBbGk3NVVhU2VpSjUyT1ZnUHZvcTd3QzFkUzd5YkFB/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(65b6750cd58239cd237a24ce271b7c25).jpg)
“Dad, can I have your credit card for Christmas? I promise to use it for Christmas presents… for myself!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrU1ZUSW1oMUpDMW9DZ3RndEJrbE9md3J6ZEVkOU5PMjdKMXJtNkVoWGZQYXh1azVqSzhJcnFCaExBQk1jMytoQVBodWxRbkpJUXFRVjk1SWkzNmJFYU5YOGpEbWFLTlZGeHlZcVhoTFZuYWt4eUE2KzV2VXNDR3pQK2hBWjc3MW9lNktETFB2S2dWVmM0UzFqdm5aYkJVPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(5b77a36d1f10018e71da36bedaf230c7).jpg)
“Dad, I know we have a big family, but can we please buy a bigger Christmas tree this year?”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUUJMZnlTcjc3WXN4bnZMV0tuUUR6UFlkUnpMMXNkblR4dWR1Y043WVBaK0RiMkVUUmlmdE1LemtqQW1DN2lIdDRIbEkzUi9IakdGVDMyekRFMis1MjRhWURxRm5mdEFkNWJlNEZuSUk4WVJQR0R0NVdLZEJPYzNSb3pucVQ4M2RHUk16OThtNHV3bmdZZCtZMGpIWmRLVFhWZ3dEZVUvWklZN0dsZmpUS2Rr/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(99af579779b08753655bb1263fcb6968).jpg)
“Dad, if you’re looking for a stocking stuffer for me, I’m perfectly content with cash!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVzRYNVNodGYvdXB5TWJWWHZaUHZXdjkrUTJLdlFsWFNTSi9KekVlNFB5RDVjNzc5dXZMS2NkdU1sbndXSHkrN0phalk1WFZENkNwTmJLTldUM2xWbE9jamhHanpRcGtGRHpOdllpRkdWT3lISzdMTWd3YUVhRTZwUXE2MktVN0pTd2VNRi9VMTlPUGt4VVJ4RWhYRlNSa3h4dWZPTVJ1WlJ4QkNTNHpkYTZT/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(d5ab616494ca21b83d6df8cbfae72f74).jpg)
“Dad, remember, Santa sees you when you’re sleeping… and also when you’re eating all the cookies!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZU5IK0VYeTIycWhGQ2w1TnNxaFFDN0RVSFQ4RTNhdTBDZkdIZUVZMncvV1U2R1ZzOWFFYzVXYUhFSjcrWmtoWU1HOG9qTFpmUGVxeFExV2kwZDhOSTVJWmE2VEVkejNRUkVidjN2VzZiTEdRejNOcGFDYTJIemprUEFFMjRPcGlpQ3p4eHdHUWI1N1BNaVQ0eTdvSTdJOHUwb1FYQUl3MVdKNjdFdEl0Q0lZ/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(45b30cddc0b8256b6724f9198978ddfb).jpg)
“Dad, I’m dreaming of a white Christmas… but if the white runs out, I’ll have a red wine instead!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUnd0ajg5SDdZQ1JadldOS2cxR0ZiaHZjcmhUaXlkN0dxUTJ4eUJPTnFLN0dVR1h1OVNROTJ1eHlWb2VWSmJxelJUTitoQ0FmU2lPWmx1ZHhRa1luRnhZeHd0MEhYMVZNcUIxMWpGVHZSRVV6bU5PNmFVcStZeG56bkJrL1pOQUZKTDFZNTdPd2k5RzhNMmFsNDduaExmdUVoZlBaT3dXbVo1Z2xKODdTZ3BnWjRqVGZqVVdsM1NteGZyWmZ0blZRZz09/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(6ada8c2f7d578baf7d6b942d431413dd).jpg)
“Dad, we should put up Christmas decorations on the roof. That way we can have Santa’s sleigh crash-landing every year!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZWthNzdiQ1BWVEh2bThzMXNnZit0MDhwcHhiQ3hXS1k5djVPeVhwVE9jeTRjUlhRbjh5alJOTGsyVzNFa3VZcnlOamtyRFBoemplaXJmWEJuc3UzQWZWNkRRbzFBMWZyV2Y5L293RmdaSW1COFBQQmJBUlBpc0p2VFV5MW96V09yOFRGU2pzL3liYzFYSWM2YTFlZm00PQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(e40ee58c640a38346147eb7ad12c02ce).jpg)
“Dad, Christmas calories don’t count, right? Because I plan on eating everything in sight!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZnpycjBpRFRCYnNSc0hVOTFvdnV2cDh4MWlGZVp2S2RuVTduMUthM0MyWC9aQkpuRGptOFFmSlJnZ1RPajBnMzZNRkRwaGNLVVJ4Tjg0bGNDNUVCemJpb2Z2QVo3MEZqZ1dHbFpCVU1HMU9wV0QxcitOUzloczVGNFh2eGR0bGk0ZG1QaDh1dkNPUU5JOVpFVmErRDFQVERhejI3ekE0ck5DRFlZQ0J5a0dJ/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(deacca282f1666b5469216aef0d32c6a).jpg)
“Dad, instead of giving me socks for Christmas, can I get a puppy? Socks don’t cuddle, you know!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWHJTVk1RYSs1cmEvNVVpWTBPSy92QThrVDdMODFWTCtHWDJxU2tQSGUrUmFhUmRSV3JKc0FMK2FpYVpyNU1EQ1lRTFNXSmF1N1ZQcWNieExOTCszOVduLzVjTWNlU1VCWklyeXFiTTJ2RDJKWFJOZmd0bHc5Z0tEL1kvNGFSNEdmRUhSQitlRG9XWFRFb0tjRnZiQ0l1OTNHWXAyRmxPUWdxSjlKdDR3Nmpr/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(4322c98667793dc15075c59e5959862c).jpg)
“Dad, how about we skip the family Christmas photo this year and save ourselves the stress of smiling awkwardly?”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUmcwK25EbCtiUE9qZzNrUEs0REtxYkI1NlhFeXRaZXppVEJCUTVyNUt5b09rK1hDd0F1enJpZURiVmQ4aXJadFUzVlRzUVV2ZktWR25UMHBjVFcxeS9NNFpySndhaUhFbVFnaldDME81TWhhVUtiaTl6UWc5NVc1Z0JEUmdFN3RsWGplM2V3NWFxMDh6b1RVS1dSOG9wZGdoRWpyWTJyZWszeWw2UWVDcEdZ/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(6ff5dad7dccb3b5c9420eacb802229ff).jpg)
“Dad, I heard Santa is bringing everyone personalized gifts this year, so I want a surprise vacation to Hawaii!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUmcwK25EbCtiUE9qZzNrUEs0REtxWWVYMlQ1bTVTYlNSM2lnd2R4Um5TcXgzS0o0eWtiWXVZSWVJRkxiSFdkenZsaVY4OW9udlNOTlFMaGFvSUpNb2JiZVVvcnZTdjJNTnBDRWsvWDhrbWZpejhwd05qKzBCelV6MkFsSHorT0tYL1owQ201andSN3BqZ243Q0hjam85YzBMNVNMYnNFREtoSHlIWTlwR1V3REtNbGFGa1hNQzA5dWE0WVZScVdnZz09/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(aee4ae3381ade5010498ebceda0578a3).jpg)
“Dad, I hope Santa brings you a lot of patience this Christmas season, because I’m planning on being extra mischievous!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrU0crODYwb2U2ejdSYjU1QlRRdUJ1VktYTFEzWk1NUkFJeDl4YWNZNGJFQjZ0dVpjNGE5UmY4cG9DakI5NlVvL3BNekFUQ2toWElCNGMyOWZpMTBTZi9DNVg3UVBhc2p4VjNnUVpENW9UZmFJWTFVanVwUGZPWmlaRGNJSHBqeDdVUzFVNkdRMDJoTm8wbnVBKzcxYWJUb0plcmsrYUZpTUdhUktzdkppQnJsVFpucFhCb05WV1l4ZVIxamQ2UjM2Q21naTVaa0VLZGdBMjJ4c1NPcDA1ST0%3D/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(92dccf90e72852f525ee047529e3f578).jpg)
“Dad, can I give you the same present as last year? Remember, it’s the thought that counts, and I didn’t have one last year!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZU5IK0VYeTIycWhGQ2w1TnNxaFFDN0Mza0hrWk9iMGpsZEViNDZWLzBvZUVmR1FLRkNpdkhjTmpJazc0aXhlQXlkVTMvVW5STkt5dS9iN0JKc2FCZDV2NFRSeUZ2NElGMjFhOE8rT1ZaV2hBSkc0NExycTJKQlZoS1k3VG5Wa0l2M044TTd3am9iNFc4ZllZM1poSWVrdGtvWEswSVFzYU41cXNoTkl5TUFaSFF5YzFZcWxkTkhOaW1sc3RoQThJdz09/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(1e60b576e3607a8bdddcfa72ad6811c5).jpg)
“Dad, I’ve been an angel all year… in my dreams. Does that still count?” THANKFUL POSITIVE BLESSINGS QUOTES
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZGF1WnhoMFlqZ21LeTd1ZnV2UmlyaEVXdHZpZ245V0gvMW9hZi9mSHlYS2ZDaVRRdmVxNjRJMHkvMVZkUS9BRVFVMXVZcUJaaGZ1U2lxT2l5ejNEdGxnclYrY0wvMUd6a1hiQ21nTS9qZW1PUS9kQTVjditlU0F1OVNzNXhydmtxWmNmT0NzVVAwa0xtR24reEhPcnVNWVF3OThOZ0pOa1RHcWhDZkhuSzkz/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(b09c0a06214d7b88d13a2ac1046e7d2d).jpg)
“Dad, Santa already checked his list twice, but I suggest you keep an eye out for any last-minute additions!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWEJUQ2p1MjdtdlhQSVpQQmVLamJMZ0VlSHdZSWQ2eGNiYk15cWc1Sk8ydnJHUUM0WWxyamFBaC9ESUIveU9YL2c2U2RMSktRSWlZWEZxbEJJcjExa1V3MVN6S2lNa1FRQ2QxWFlXMzBzclYyR2d1QUNWRlg2Nm05dktQNHoxTm5XeVVWanpqTzlCQUhjUUlGSmNzbXREZmtJZEJIOHZycisxajJHUWdsMlRkc2IvOWt2NHNZMUxxK2NvUU96Qk5pUT09/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(af5f25097fcda4923ce52ed7b3aca985).jpg)
“Dad, when Santa visits our house, can you ask him to bring me a Mercedes? I’ll take care of the reindeer parking!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrV0QySVFZQUVXaXFUY0FEVlVzQTlSeE1ab0RwRGJPUWpHZS8vdkh2RVBaelpEMVBFdDFIelFUTG5mRGpLWFZlM05VT3pQblpJbUQ0aG82YkFNU1JPbEoyTlRnbUs3V0RjWkN5TGJPVTNIVWFYb0lTbGUxbXFoS1NCQ3VJMFFQNVdEV2U1UFI3M1NoOEpHdk5FT3pzVjQ1emdrWUVEZ3Q1UFcyYUE1aThHYWhvRyttbjhEcUMxY1NFMDAwcm16OERDZz09/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(f305fd8a51fe29be3f9848c8fa5f766c).jpg)
“Dad, let’s be honest, you really just put coal in our stockings because you were too lazy to go Christmas shopping!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWDdaRlF2bG8vQ0dVNGc3eWpyVnd3VDZQbGRueUhUN25tZ3FseWVIZWd5ZEFMTW5VT0ZlVldjNjB5VnN3VU5IWVo1WjhEMFZCQzZTSXNaTGJsYTl5a3VyVHQwTXVuYk5pN3B2cWFKSUVNNFNySERPRDVVNXdZVTllM3A1MGVZQ3NWR2VEbFBXZzExQUp6RmNWdjQyZzFTTVZIczliQzcwcVNKTGYvZDYwcXQ5/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(ab99872a7b5efa7d3915098888fd8f37).jpg)
“Dad, I can explain why I want all these Christmas presents… I blame it on my genes. I get it from you!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZTg0OUwvWGtVcE1FTjgwc2FzOVluUmNDNU5NeGVKZFFhK00xMTk0bVh0RlhlVCtqU2pvZkV5amRRdG1CdHc4ZGN0ak8yYmMrVHJKQUVRNVUwOHVGZE90LzhWTlZZUDh1WktNTHVoZTRlRzNEV3ljM0hRWHpibHd0dG5HRVZPWnFCcGNuR2RWNURqUE02OHF6T3BBR0NsWXNzNDh3bTM1enRaQWFOeCszTUJNQ2RMTGt0TmN0TmMwR05yL05hL0ptSTg2Z0toZEYxSW1yVUFQVElJaVUwWnJMR2twOHVFUG1RREVMVlF0NWJPcA%3D%3D/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(4ef7661f69bd77c20d030f63b99badbb).jpg)
“Dad, this Christmas, let’s try to keep the family gathering as drama-free as possible. That means no political discussions at the dinner table!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrV0QySVFZQUVXaXFUY0FEVlVzQTlSeVhCUUJraGFHN3lHU2w1ZExoSTAvaTBpR01oYzZxUEdiV3NpNnJ1MXBrL0NLY0UwZGZpQ2dHbTJPQzg0ZFU1ZXFkQnJPRklKOTl4RGVEcHhqekxVSWZYakZtc2tJaTd6R0F4VXMxR1VhUUtqK1lINm9VUHp6bDBZWC9Ga3pnMXZ6TXJtN2p2VE9uR1BRSUV4MXA2OVYvc1BRcC9sR2pMbGRyWGRGaGFOVFdIUT09/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(2560684bd28e30b33114bb44bccecc53).jpg)
“Dad, let’s break the tradition this year and give each other the gift of not arguing over who gets the last piece of pie!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrU1ZUSW1oMUpDMW9DZ3RndEJrbE9meTVaWUEwLzV2T2VLZHJuTys4c25ZTUoyeUpaY3YyZkxrU3JuU3FocUFRaG13RVYzWmZReVQvTnhRcUNIZ2V5V1BFeHNsWk5ERjNXbzc1alJmUm9KVngyVXhPUmJ4U3VCQnlJUm51bVpaSmwyQTZJd0txcDNWWjcvYnRzK3JhdDlBd0lXejNSYU5qZENvVlVDZ0NIYkVJSmpNUE5pa2R3OUJKK3hwbHl2NmdxUT09/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(0d73592515374a90bd3fcd77c1d9bfdb).jpg)
“Dad, I know the secret to a great holiday season – lots of laughter, endless food, and zero Christmas carol singing!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZWthNzdiQ1BWVEh2bThzMXNnZit0MHY0MUJFemQxdkV6ZUJ4cjVnc3E3MnhyekJUa1YwY0JJTHNjc3dqdC83UWVzeG9WRjdDMyttQ05UTGdNTjRXMHBJNVMvb2ZjbFBEWUxacjZ3Y3dURzRmNlRsRzJibUZxWHU5ellPcDJHL1djWmVYdUhHQXVMQUxReVBGRDJqaU9ackRMQ0ZKVXFaWmVVU08ycDBUKzZW/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(151df1fc5659a4373ffd232e208a30f2).jpg)
“Dad, Christmas is like a job – it comes with a lot of stress, but we do it for the joy of the bonus presents!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVk4yMGRoRStDWTRtK0dtR0Y2QnpIM2xWSWFrWis3Y0syS0kxTy91aHlCRlRYb0pDSThqbG9ncGRvY1A0dXJVRUVBMXltc09SWTV5WVpxRWZTcFdVL3ZTb2I2K3F4UU9vSXNzZFo1ZEFZSUVERnVlYnJOVm1lQjFrL2FnajFyMXlVRHR1WEwwdGNkVEx4RGowd0VKVXRzZEhRc01BVDNua2lOOU4zTEVCbk9K/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(f81360f52423a3fc66459b18e4d95150).jpg)
“Dad, try not to confuse Santa with the mailman when it comes to opening Christmas cards. That could get awkward!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrV0QySVFZQUVXaXFUY0FEVlVzQTlSd2tWNnUzM3JKMTA3QmNLM28xU1pDamZWYzl6WjZqV3ZGNnFnYmV6bDRZTXR5MTJEMmZPaDJSTThnUXcyelNpTDNiblZXQVJXSG1zNHJVazRtT3RxdGY3eFdzeWt2U3lPVzF0Z2R1NmF4Z1lqcjdQb2dmaXhPUklxOStNaWVNN3B3bkdCa2EzL3RZWFJDa0pxMmNBUExtajRkUVlrZ242c2pHZFBCUXh2Q0oxUTd4MjBhbExzbWRLVlJlYkIrQUl5az0%3D/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(12c4cf40697db1470b05d7b7f64dcc63).jpg)
“Dad, let’s hire some reindeer and practice our own sleigh-driving skills this Christmas. I’m certain Santa won’t mind!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUnd0ajg5SDdZQ1JadldOS2cxR0ZianBneVFTTjFEemNnRGVxQ01uUVkxc1ZRNWdvOXRROFovTUNRS1kycjVWdzdMNVc5NEpCRHlvTTgwd0libkVHNkxLUXZudTBNdmM1bmZleVNLclVkR1NYODE5a2puTTdKNDF4REZDRXB2SC9qT0RwMDZWb3NjdXhSQTdsS1VMdG8veGhoalFIZDZFQXhENWpKdkwwSG82TDJORDRaY1JXV3NSMFlGekdEL3piZz09/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(fa9005d76cd61138f23323501d8adbdf).jpg)
“Dad, we should establish a new holiday tradition – instead of exchanging gifts, we can exchange hilarious dad jokes!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZTg0OUwvWGtVcE1FTjgwc2FzOVluUmNDNU5NeGVKZFFhK00xMTk0bVh0RjFVbnZUT3o2UFliS2E4OVR6bzFiWFpLeXRIaUlyQUpuL3k5ZHlvMXliU2tLZDZmVkxRd0lNNVZrcUFUckpVcjV6bnVwUXVLUDBieTErQ05wWFpXTW1QTmhmMjl5ZkNlLzZGZCtTMHcvWE4xV0dhNXBNMEx2VkNOWVIwd1hDL3ZDdGVodEtFOS9iQTE3d2p2Y244b1gwQjd1RzAyWmdMdzFSTFBVZ2tVTDRTZz0%3D/FUNNY+CHRISTMAS+QUOTES+FOR+DAD/(98eb189cc39205a511a8e92e16876cdf).jpg)
“Dad, this Christmas, let’s remember the true meaning of the season – giving in to our laziness and staying in our pajamas all day!”