ADDAMS FAMILY FUNNY QUOTES

“Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly.” – Morticia Addams

“I’m just like any modern woman trying to have it all. Loving husband, a family. It’s just… I wish I had more time to seek out the dark forces and join their unholy crusade.” – Morticia Addams

Gomez: “You are unique, you are wise, you are gentle, and you are rare.” Morticia: “What a clever lie.”

“Wednesday Addams: [referring to her brother Pugsley] He can’t control himself. He’s suffering from puberty. Only time will cure him, if he survives.”

“I’m a homicidal maniac, they look just like everyone else.” – Wednesday Addams

“Gomez: [to Morticia] Cara Mia, did you decorate the house for Thanksgiving? Morticia: Yes, I did. It was very difficult. But the Indians and the Pilgrims were having a wrestling match.”

“Normal is an illusion, and the reality is much more interesting.” – Morticia Addams

“There’s something strangely freeing about finally admitting who you really are.” – Morticia Addams

Gomez: “Tish, you live in a museum with fur rugs and a little naked statue in the hall.” Morticia: “What else can I do? We’re missing a great opportunity. Romance is dead. It was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney, homogenized, and sold off piece by piece.”

“Children, beings of pure chaos!” – Morticia Addams

Morticia: “Gomez, you’re so romantic.” Gomez: “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“Life is pain, darling. Anyone who says otherwise is selling something.” – Morticia Addams

“A true friend stabs you in the front.” – Wednesday Addams

“Gomez: Don’t torture yourself. That’s my job.” Morticia: “Thank you, darling.”

Morticia: “Gomez, why don’t you carve the turkey?” Gomez: “You carve the turkey. I cherish the old traditions. Thanksgiving without traditional Addams family values is hardly Thanksgiving at all!” QUOTES ABOUT CHILDHOOD FRIENDS FALLING IN LOVE

“I’m a master of disguise; no one recognizes me when I don’t wear this face.” – Morticia Addams

Gomez: “Darling, you are a beautiful monster.” Morticia: “Thank you, dear.”

“I’m just like any modern woman, I juggle. Three balls: home, work, and a husband who’s always lost in his own hidden world.” – Morticia Addams

“Black is such a happy color.” – Morticia Addams

Gomez: “Last night, you were unhinged. You were like some desperate, howling demon. You frightened me. Do it again!” Morticia: “I’m sorry, I’m just not that woman anymore.”

“Wednesday: I hate everything. Morticia: Ah! The Addams family motto.”

“I’m smiling because I have no idea what’s going on.” – Uncle Fester

Gomez: “Death is a natural part of life. It’s just that she’s fifteen and I’m still in love with her mother.” Morticia: “Gomez, she’ll be sixteen in a few years.”

“The world is full of monsters with friendly faces.” – Morticia Addams

“Are you unhappy, darling? Being hugged to death?” – Morticia Addams

“Once again, you have greatly entertained us with your tales of…despair.” – Gomez Addams

“Gomez: [to Morticia] Wake up darling, the day is half gone. Morticia: The day is half gone already? Gomez, you’re mellow dramatic.”

“I’m just a friendly neighborhood homicidal maniac.” – Wednesday Addams

Gomez: “We need a blood-mdical doctor!” Morticia: “It’s what we have. How many times do I have to tell you? The undead can’t get sick; it’s one of the few perks we get!”