BEST CLARKSON QUOTES

“Power is nothing without control.”

“Speed never killed anyone. Suddenly becoming stationary, that’s what gets you.”

“I’m sorry, but having an Audi R8 outside your house is like having ‘I’m Ordinary’ tattooed on your forehead.”

“The fact is, cars are just inanimate objects and are therefore incapable of being evil. But that doesn’t stop me from hating them.”

“If you’re going to drive a 4×4 in the city, why not just wear a T-shirt that says ‘I’m insecure about the size of my penis’?”

“Some say he isn’t machine washable, and all his potted plants are called Steve.”

“If you were a car, you’d be a write-off.”

“Speed limits are just guidelines.”

“I’m not sure whether my face was flushed from the exertion of the ride or the knowledge that I’d just almost wiped out on national television.”

“I’m not a vegetarian because I love animals. I’m a vegetarian because I hate plants.”

“I’m not a pessimist, I’m a realist with a sense of humor.”

“The air conditioning in the car is only as good as the last time you had it re-gassed. After two weeks, it’s a little bit like a dog breathing on you.”

“I am so excited that if I hadn’t just been to the loo, I think I’d have wet myself.”

“Speed is the only truly modern sensation.”

“The best cars are the ones that get things wrong.” LOYAL HEART QUOTES

“A turbo, exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens, and you go faster.”

“Everybody knows that if you’re going to give a fairly long speech, you start with a joke.”

“When did a car stop being something that makes you smile and become something that stops everyone else from making you smile?”

“The only way to stop people moaning about the weather is to shoot them.”

“That had a lock-up on the diff, mate! I’ve never driven a car that’s had a lock-up on the diff before.”

“I’m sorry, but having a DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch.”

“So, what do we have here, then? Well, my first impression is that it is a bit of a handful.”

“Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what… being stabbed?”

“Americans do not enjoy driving, too many people are driving Hyundais and Americans are too busy comparing the cup holders in their SUVs.”

“If you do go round a corner – and you will because it’s on the runway at Dunsfold Park – something odd happens. You go a bit wobbly. You see, the tires are having to cope with lateral and forward motion.”

“It’s like God’s drunk all the time, you know? So unpredictable.”

“Speed has never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary… that’s what gets you.”

“I’m not an advocate of driving recklessly, I’m an advocate of driving like there’s no tomorrow.”

“I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled-down version of God.”