BEST FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT ANYTHING

“I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.” – Douglas Adams

“I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy-saving mode.” – Unknown

“My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.” – Unknown

“I can resist everything except temptation.” – Oscar Wilde

“I don’t go crazy. I am crazy. I just go normal from time to time.” – Unknown

“I’m not clumsy. It’s just the floor hates me, the tables and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way.” – Unknown

“Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring, so I go back to being myself.” – Unknown

“I was born to make mistakes, not to fake perfection.” – Drake

“I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.” – Unknown

“Common sense is like deodorant, the people who need it most never use it.” – Unknown

“When I die, I want my tombstone to say ‘didn’t forward that chain email to 10 people and nothing happened to her.'” – Unknown QUOTES ABOUT BEST FRIENDS ALWAYS BEING THERE

“The best way to predict the future is to create it.” – Peter Drucker

“If we were meant to stay in one place, we’d have roots instead of feet, he said.” – Rachel Wolchin

“Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.” – Miles Kington

“The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.” – Al McGuire

“I don’t need a hairstylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.” – Unknown

“I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, just to be sure.” – Unknown

“The only time success comes before work is in the dictionary.” – Vidal Sassoon

“I’m not sarcastic. I’m just intelligent beyond your understanding.” – Unknown

“The only reason I’m fat is because a tiny body couldn’t store all this personality.” – Unknown

“I don’t need a hairstylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.” – Unknown