BEST KEVIN MCCALLISTER QUOTES

“I made my family disappear.”

“I don’t want to go on the trip. I don’t want to see my relatives. I don’t want to spend the holidays with anyone. You understand?”

“This is extremely important. Will you please tell Santa that instead of presents this year, I just want my family back.”

“This house is so full of people, it makes me sick. When I grow up and get married, I’m living alone.”

“I’m the man of the house now. We go by my rules, and if you don’t like it, you can just leave!”

“Bless this highly nutritious microwavable macaroni and cheese dinner and the people who sold it on sale. Amen.”

“Hey, I’m not afraid anymore. I said I’m not afraid anymore. Do you hear me? I’m not afraid anymore!”

“Buzz, your girlfriend. Woof!”

“You can mess with a lot of things, but you can’t mess with kids on Christmas.”

“I’m not giving up on you. I know you’re still in there, and I’m not leaving you home alone.”

“I made my family disappear twice.”

“Keep the change, you filthy animal!”

“You guys give up yet? Or are you thirsty for more?”

“You guys are idiots!”

“I’m free! I’m free! I’m unattended, and I don’t even care!”

“Wet bandits! It’s fishy, and if I know Harry, it’s gonna get hairy.” SAD TOUGH LIFE QUOTES

“I’m not afraid of the dark. I’m afraid of the basement.”

“Does Santa Claus have to shave his beard?”

“I’m not the most responsible kid on the block, but you gotta give me some credit, a guy who drives a dump truck should know better than to park in front of another guy’s driveway.”

“I don’t want to ruin their lives, I just want to ruin their day.”

“Don’t you know a kid always wins against two idiots?”

“Kids are always ahead of their parents. That’s why parents always panic.”

“Is this toothbrush approved by the American Dental Association?”

“I took a shower washing every body part with actual soap; including all my major crevices, including in-between my toes and in my belly button, which I never did before but sort of enjoyed.”

“I have to get the groceries out of the car; if I don’t, l’ll get in trouble.”

“I’m eight years old. Do you think I’d be here alone? I don’t think so.”

“Excuse me, where’s the lobby?”

“Guys, I’m eating junk and watching rubbish! You better come out and stop me!”

“Batteries? We don’t need no stinkin’ batteries!”

“I’m sorry, don’t worry about me. I’ll be OK. I’m going to keep the parents out of trouble.”