![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrY0NjVEs2SnN2U0oydDNSQS9TejdNRVAycGhYeWRyaDVFUE9XUlNLaUdaWFc1UEdtR3pod1Z2NWpQOTBEZGc0bzhyTVlHbHVsL2RBeXRMaDArNVlqMU5WNUs5SnBzQ25LQndOVzVIVDdjcHdvOVNwWnFLRVhqdDF6akdNdWswd09nPT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(7be621e81c819952b251d9b9737d6566).jpg)
“I drink to drown my sorrows, but the damn things have learned to swim.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrYTZHaDdLdEZDNEJwd2QxeDFoQmFjM01mOW5ZcHZERitrRTdHYjlrMzlIb3ZqZ25DVnF5bUg2RzM3UnNCanZld0hnTXZQOFRGcFVaejNYU1A0N1MwSDcwVCtQSVRaL2ZDdzRIUzlSRWNZVHIyYnFTKzNkMnVrQ096a25tNG9WemxnPT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(3e1be571b064ff064ab9b4403773ab29).jpg)
“Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVDlvSTR1ZG41ZzFuMVpGVStXN3R2aUxtOEI0UmNqUFYzVTZ4QmVoanZKRWVUZFNFNFhGTk1yUmU1YUk5WmI0WU03QVhOK0tPQXN1dkhoQVZWR3U3OWttbGxudmplT1VMRE9Na1haYUc1VWVBcXdqSXVsMkVvdzNnUldzSUNQazhnPT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(9ce1bd0b3eff47f24b133c2ec1fdb156).jpg)
“I don’t have a drinking problem, except when I can’t get a drink.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRmSmp0Q2ZWUnZGOUpMeTZGRzBRZFl2TWJVTytKb1VBRjJSRmE1OVY4djZaNVRQbmtVbFdnekFMZU1VdVpGSmdXZXFmWHJzVGFBWjBFVXZLMTZjU3NxOVZVVWVRTWxMdnJ3QTBTbEJnY1NPSmEwaG5WRVAvTWRGZW0wRElZWXZRPT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(1c67d39397411e215d853d2d2ee4f17b).jpg)
“I’m not an alcoholic, I just have a strong affection for alcohol.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUUxMdGludUlTUDAyd1pKbXd0bWt4WXgvWVpHQStQN3NCdWxKVzRrYlNoQjVjK1dQRHZNN3hMd1h4YklwdmNxZHkwOEFYcHc1d09hRjZRSWZxdnFWVUdGYWRSYjg3T2FBYU1rMUNTV1VZQmgwNmJXU1hFQzVLdGVDeUdod2s0c05IQkZCNU4rbG1rZlB5VG8yNWdoNTJzPQ%3D%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(c57dccfeac1fee3860d720a9bbd6042d).jpg)
“My wife says I drink because I’m unhappy. I’m unhappy because she says I drink.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrU0xMZHdjbG81bGx4UnJ3MnlsVE9EdXlyejZuOTZuR0hsSHdvZHFwUWdUaUV1MlQ5OUQ1V3RZYlNXYnVya1QxaGR3V3hYL1VxM21nQnIxUG5sWHBmZWVaVkZBdmdFVll6TWlYc0JQY20yS3I%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(c8d3720f1f9d614e0cd01003d0484fbb).jpg)
“I may not be perfect, but my liver is perfectly pickled.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZkJYSmgzZVh3S21nU25NN2VZWEZDZ0hueXFxYXpRMDdZR2luakZjNjNVeWNNRW5ueCtHNFgvWm5nRmxlUk1GTWVyMkF0NVJFNEc4WG1qeU9MM24wL1VCVEY3SG1TMklhQXJiTSswWlI0bmUwNFlpZ1RPUE52VmhqRWlxWFAwcTF3PT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(b4f78a587fc8d22b386ff1ad07a8fd9c).jpg)
“The only drinking problem I have is when I can’t find a drink.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZkVta0hxN1lFZ3hzMEs1NSt0a0VqS2lqUjdPNDBpR21mcmg0R3NNb2w4ZnN4Sm9oWGhLdzNJbHptYjBMaDZuMFB5M09Od0pBZEc0blZyL1doVkNISGNmMUJ3QURkR2tYYUtNSi9Va2NPRUZTblp1aUNtaENnbW8rZUI5eWZhcWRBPT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(1620fa3acd5cd2441dca1ede671a0cc5).jpg)
“Wine is constant proof that God loves us and likes to see us happy.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrY3lrNTlOWlhqalBLYXloQUdqS1htNGpVWmtnQllwVThySHREczRiMFVNTXFudmQ5bUxBM2RkdEwxdDM5OFpycEpFWC9OT2pPeWkwUW5EamV4aUlUN2c9/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(cc91b8a8ec2bb20dd109a0b896e8784f).jpg)
“I drink to make other people interesting.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrYTZHaDdLdEZDNEJwd2QxeDFoQmFjMzJiVmJoV2grVUI2VTExUjBHc0l6dDE4ckpEM2wwNlVLbGx0dHVINElwUzhMOXZNUVl3Y0lSVzEybVh6SVZMUUExZlRrUVhJN2ptM3ZtU3BYTjRVWlhneXp6TEo4T2ZVVDhrTFhoOVV3cHJnPT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(1a4247755f655e1c9921190b1e030ed4).jpg)
“Alcohol may be a temporary solution, but it sure makes the problems look blurry.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrY3lrNTlOWlhqalBLYXloQUdqS1htNlVHUEI4NlA4TlI0dlE1ZFpwdlZxcFVDZTZDZ2ZhaWU1Q29FMlBBSlhGcEt1T29WclRvOHF2Tno1a3RialR1L283OTZoaGl4N0RJREpKREJUMVFWNzQ%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(31ac883539f39db0f1a1e0b992b9b267).jpg)
“I drink because adulting is hard and booze is my reward.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVDlvSTR1ZG41ZzFuMVpGVStXN3R2aUxtOEI0UmNqUFYzVTZ4QmVoanZKRUJxZVlUREYvY0hCeklVOEJXSk0wSHczS3RQK3BVS3AxWTdZdTNNdWdid1NyeEZ1UlM0TlArT0tmaFBvcHp4WitIUmNsM0w2bStjYVowYy9zb3Q0cEt3PT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(484a408fd0184effa597ded0de1d2d95).jpg)
“I don’t have a drinking problem, I have a stopping problem.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRmSmp0Q2ZWUnZGOUpMeTZGRzBRYzJCQmE1TEJMZTQwV0R0djVWSzJ5T21jMXZ2Z2tiK1hweStyYzdBL2Y0MUY4Qk52MGE0dE1hcnk5M291cWhubkY2N0tNQXNackduRTdkZ05sa3pLK01Vbm9ub201Tk9mKzdLdlo1R1ZFMmtRPT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(03d6d6b38483dbc7a89250db8ee0d577).jpg)
“I’m not drunk, just chemically happy.” HE FEELS LIKE HOME QUOTES
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUUl6YmJBNU8xem5vY29vbHRMOFRTWTZWS0ZvOFh2M3dDYm9rNnBic2hrTWVidmQyOGRudTVCaS8rRWVoSHRueE82dHNBQXJsQXFQZTd1WE1FaUlzazgwU2VxcTJhbW9ORHdnQmlnckpIWmk%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(8a5d79f3dcaaf515b0d0ca03018dbdcc).jpg)
“When life gives you lemons, vodka makes it all bearable.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRmSmp0Q2ZWUnZGOUpMeTZGRzBRZTJ4NXQxbFNoQ0c3MXRCSWwrSmV0bFJ0MXdtZHhUTzRKZzJrakcvb1dyeXRGb0xTdnRqUUM2WWhCNzF6RjBmNGwyY3djdFBxczNOZC9KeUxsRGpaK1A%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(337d281eaffc0f0c37622e5fca84c4ad).jpg)
“I’m not a heavy drinker, I’m a gravity tester.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUnJNYWUxWTNmaGFpVExkTHNDaWlJTERPNlp2RWkwQTNWR045bkFJMFMxZWtkcTlVWkxCZVZoeVVlODIyOTNaMWc9PQ%3D%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(96844b113e0aeb2abe0a1c22857f180e).jpg)
“Whiskey is a hug in a glass.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZDc5KzN0UEdja0cvcXUrTXArQ0I5RUp6R3B5UkQyM2dmSmpoTS9LdkJOTk1kTlRpaEdxSGxvZjVpQXFEK1IySDVLZktTRVl2c1hmRUVLcVBENndyREt0WWdLWUp1eTA3bGFKUmxEd2dsNVJISlZ4M0o1VEJsZ3IrSVNwSkwyUEZRPT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(2758c9f3f3e9734254b2c9fdde440659).jpg)
“Alcohol: because no good story ever started with someone eating a salad.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVTNmY0VseGt2cUk5S1FMK3JzaWwrWFNWVk9MUXpHVkhQK0dQNHNCNmMrODNCaHNsK0FkblNEZ2dBS29WYTZFaDI2eEI0azZUY0FHUHl1cjlnL05pbHNjNzFVYk9ZMmpYTC9PbjBJVkpsWTQ%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(860ece1ab4cf248b2b51948f0ea8c34d).jpg)
“It’s not drinking alone if the cat is home.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWUxYcnQveC9ic3RZZ2VOdEIzbWdFSVh4c1MrOHQrYmpSMTQxaVpkYVc0K0NoWlZnQWw3UGhsZ1NzUGdZTVI1R08xcGVqTjdEZ1BMQXYwK3ZMUWhwRjhSc1F2aHI0OHZ4bEVMd2t3eUIvaGVpYWt0VlV3WVA3TmpmN3lUTzdxdXJDY2o2YU9NS1FKNlprVnpwZlFZWW9ZPQ%3D%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(13283c4ea372c43abbd72021f0be16bd).jpg)
“I never drink while I’m working… unless I’m working on my next drink.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVDlvSTR1ZG41ZzFuMVpGVStXN3R2aUxtOEI0UmNqUFYzVTZ4QmVoanZKRUJxZVlUREYvY0hCeklVOEJXSk0wSDlkNjRuejg3bjhmeDVEeXVBOFpUVjdUam5DWFI4S2FXN0cwZUgvNWNnQU5BbXVhVFg3ck93ODJXKzBXaU0zdVdnPT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(d3e0184803562f0af7b4f88b02963c0b).jpg)
“I don’t have a drinking problem, I have a drinking solution.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVDlvSTR1ZG41ZzFuMVpGVStXN3R2aFp0S3JETW1RMkcxTTVCeXpyckkvOU9aeGs1aWg1MEh3QjlYYm1GR3RTdHRYTUpoR2JGeGtkSk41dlZaY0JIL0ZrM3dGT0FURnJUWEFTOElOSnFWdnhPTE9ZenRSV0k3aExoRWhvT21HeWVBPT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(55ab4514c0e4940da641eae960ea2a18).jpg)
“I don’t always drink, but when I do, I become a lot more interesting.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZDc5KzN0UEdja0cvcXUrTXArQ0I5RTI1OHJhMDhsMzFxUGZqZGV2Zks2WE5rWTUvVll5TVpRNTAwMktrd09VZ3E5RkNiZTQ4M0NhamNyeFFnVWlEcmJVdmFPOTduaUluWUhVOVZPN2k5TEQ%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(2234b82d0c09f0323507d6f8ca649976).jpg)
“Alcohol: because no great story ever started with a salad.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRWbmNJamdWWk5kdE1wNTlpMjRWU1hZZjM2NlYyL0lkS1JIOEZGQTE5K2I1NHo0cnRSR3NoT3l2QWRyT1pkK29QTVVPNlFyTkhScWJDWnhZeWpzV3M9/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(9e63d15da3a9fb6da037ad2845620eb3).jpg)
“Life is too short to drink bad wine.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRmSmp0Q2ZWUnZGOUpMeTZGRzBRZFl2TWJVTytKb1VBRjJSRmE1OVY4dnJ1cDltVzErbGI3QnRwUWFzeXhMOS9lR0JqSXpKRlNKMS95WW1yNjNnV0NlTzJZYWVHWmlKU3hxb3BIYTY1YzA%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(bbd0575c3926ebebfc3b18bb69c44aa2).jpg)
“I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a professional drinker.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZDc5KzN0UEdja0cvcXUrTXArQ0I5RUR0endncVdsNmIwSjI5UkpESENBeUc3NXVYT0EzS2w0bEpsSnNFc2ZTZVZvcGlSNTc1MHlVQy9RaVY5WEZnTDhzMDlVc25KWUkrZVNBbm9lUVkzYW1teitvdlh6NVVsc3I2WlZqRXYxL093PT0%3D/DRUNKARD+HUSBAND+QUOTES/(4a93f2fad70efb00fd53082a7c91961c).jpg)
“Alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.”