“I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.” – Oscar Wilde
“I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.” – Groucho Marx
“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Thomas Edison
“The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.” – Terry Pratchett
“I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, just to be sure.” – Unknown
“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.” – Jim Carrey
“I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.” – W.C. Fields
“I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.” – Charles Lamb
“I’m sorry, if you were right, I’d agree with you.” – Robin Williams
“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?” – Robin Williams
“I’m not afraid of death; I just don’t want to be there when it happens.” – Woody Allen
“I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.” – Douglas Adams LOVE QUOTES FOR HUSBAND IN ENGLISH
“I’m not a vegetarian because I love animals. I’m a vegetarian because I hate plants.” – A. Whitney Brown
“The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby.” – Natalie Wood
“I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don’t know the answer.” – Douglas Adams
“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.” – Earl Wilson
“I can resist everything except temptation.” – Oscar Wilde
“If it weren’t for the last minute, nothing would get done.” – Rita Mae Brown
“Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.” – Elbert Hubbard
“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.” – Steve Martin
“The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.” – Harlan Ellison
“I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.” – Unknown