FAMOUS FUNNY MARRIAGE QUOTES

“Marriage is a workshop… where the husband works and the wife shops!” – Unknown

“A good marriage is where both people feel like they’re getting the better end of the deal.” – Anne Lamott

“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” – Mignon McLaughlin

“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.” – Jim Carrey

“Marriage is like a game of chess, except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke, and no move you make will have any effect on the outcome.” – Jerry Seinfeld

“Marriage is like a walk in the park… Jurassic Park!” – Unknown

“Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.” – Pauline Thomason

“Marriage is like a phone call in the night: first the ring, and then you wake up.” – Evelyn Hendrickson

“Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is the husband.” – Unknown

“Marriage is a wonderful institution… but who wants to live in an institution?” – Groucho Marx

“Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.” – Gilbert K. Chesterton

“I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” – Rita Rudner

“Marriage: A legal or religious ceremony that goes horribly wrong about halfway through.” – Unknown

“An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.” – Agatha Christie SPRING WORK QUOTES

“Marriage is not just spiritual communion, it is also remembering to take out the trash.” – Joyce Brothers

“A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.” – Robert Quillen

“Marry a man your own age: as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.” – Phyllis Diller

“In my house, I’m the boss. My wife is just the decision-maker.” – Woody Allen

“The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.” – H. V. Prochnow

“The secret to a happy marriage remains a secret.” – Henny Youngman

“Marriage is like vitamins: we supplement each other’s strengths and balance each other’s weaknesses.” – Unknown

“Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need are two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade.” – Unknown

“Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind.” – Unknown

“A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores.” – Terry Pratchett

“Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.” – Unknown

“A marriage is like a dollar bill. You can’t spend half of it when you tear it in two.” – Unknown