FAMOUS FUNNY QUOTES FROM CELEBRITIES

“I’m sorry, if you were right, I’d agree with you.” – Robin Williams

“I don’t need a baby growing inside me for nine months. For one thing, there’s morning sickness. If I’m going to feel nauseous and achy when I wake up, I want to achieve that state the old-fashioned way: getting good and drunk the night before.” – Ellen DeGeneres

“The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.” – Oscar Wilde

“I was always fascinated by people who are considered completely normal, because I find them the weirdest of all.” – Johnny Depp

“I’m sure wherever my dad is; he’s looking down on us. He’s not dead, just very condescending.” – Jack Whitehall

“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.” – Jim Carrey

“I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” – Lily Tomlin

“If a woman tells you she’s 20 and looks 16, she’s If she tells you she’s 26 and looks 26, she’s damn near 40.” – Chris Rock

“If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?” – Lily Tomlin

“I’m not a vegetarian because I love animals. I’m a vegetarian because I hate plants.” – A. Whitney Brown

“I’m a vegetarian. I don’t eat anything with a face. Well, except for fish. But they all look the same to me.” – Joss Stone

“I asked my dad for a car, and he said, ‘Well, can you make your payments?’ I said, ‘No.’ He said, ‘Well, then, you can’t have the car.’ So I asked him for a brother.” – Emo Philips

“I never said I wanted a ‘happy’ life but an interesting one. From separation and loss, I have learned a lot.” – Angelina Jolie

“I’m not afraid of death; I just don’t want to be there when it happens.” – Woody Allen FAMOUS 50 CENT QUOTES ABOUT SUCCESS

“I don’t want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth, even if it costs them their job.” – Samuel Goldwyn

“I’m not afraid to die; I just don’t want to be there when it happens.” – Spike Milligan

“I have an unfortunate personality.” – Orson Welles

“I’m very pleased with each advancement in my life, but now I just feel stupid every time I get another award.” – Shia LaBeouf

“The difference between being in a relationship and being in prison is that in prisons, they let you play softball on the weekends.” – Bobby Kelton

“My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far, I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.” – Dave Barry

“I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.” – Oscar Wilde

“I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.” – Douglas Adams

“I never feel more alone than when I’m trying to put sunscreen on my back.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” – Lily Tomlin

“When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun.'” – Groucho Marx

“All my life, I’ve always wanted to be somebody, but I see now I should have been more specific.” – Lily Tomlin