FATHER TED QUOTE

“That would be an ecumenical matter!” – Father Ted Crilly

“Down with this sort of thing!” – Father Jack Hackett

“I’m not a fascist. I’m a priest. Fascists dress up in black and tell people what to do, whereas priests…” – Father Ted Crilly

“The money was just resting in my account!” – Father Ted Crilly

“I hear you’re a racist now, Father?” – Father Ted Crilly

“You have to move with the times, responsible people use contraception now.” – Father Dougal McGuire

“I’ve had to lie constantly or nobody would have listened to a word I said.” – Father Dougal McGuire

“I’d love to go, but I’m not going to!” – Father Jack Hackett

“Drink! Feck! Arse!” – Father Jack Hackett

“Would you stop sucking those feckin’ mint leaves!” – Father Jack Hackett

“Careful now!” – Father Ted Crilly QUOTES ABOUT SUMMER AND FAMILY

“It’s like a big tide of jam coming towards us, but jam made out of old women.” – Father Dougal McGuire

“I can explain everything. And I will. I’ll explain everything.” – Father Dougal McGuire

“I can’t sleep with you two standing there like a pair of burglars!” – Mrs. Doyle

“Ted, I’ve got something to say to you, but I don’t know how to put it… I’m leaving.” – Mrs. Doyle

“I hate funerals, Ted. The women always take it worse than the men.” – Mrs. Doyle

“Am I right in thinking that there’s going to be a lot of drink taken?” – Mrs. Doyle

“Of course I do! God almighty! Stop with the feckin’ questions!” – Father Jack Hackett

“You can’t give it away, Ted!” – Father Jack Hackett

“Go on, Dougal, try it on. Oh, wow, it’s perfect! It’s never too late for romance!” – Mrs. Doyle

“Ted, I have to tell you something. I want to confess something. I’m not actually a priest.” – Dougal McGuire