FUNNY MOTIVATIONAL QUOTES INSPIRATIONAL FUNNY QUOTES

“I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.” – Thomas Jefferson

“The only way to do great work is to love what you do.” – Steve Jobs

“I failed my way to success.” – Thomas Edison

“The road to success is always under construction.” – Lily Tomlin

“Don’t watch the clock; do what it does. Keep going.” – Sam Levenson

“The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs… one step at a time.” – Joe Girard

“Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.” – Albert Schweitzer

“I started with nothing, and I still have most of it.” – Michael Davis

“The best way to predict the future is to create it.” – Peter Drucker

“The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt

“The key to success is to start before you are ready.” – Marie Forleo

“I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.” – Oscar Wilde

“When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.” – Cathy Guisewite

“The only time I set the bar low is for limbo.” – Michael Scott (The Office) THE LIVING WILL ENVY THE DEAD QUOTE

“The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.” – Unknown

“I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes… she hugged me.” – Unknown

“I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.” – Douglas Adams

“If at first, you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.” – Steven Wright

“I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and think, ‘Well, that’s not going to happen.'” – Unknown

“The first 90% of the task takes 90% of the time, and the last 10% takes the other 90%.” – Unknown

“It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by then I was too famous.” – Robert Benchley

“You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?” – Steven Wright

“I’m not a vegetarian because I love animals, I’m a vegetarian because I hate plants.” – A. Whitney Brown

“The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.” – Gerald Burrill

“I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.” – Unknown

“I wake up every morning, and I say to myself, ‘I’m still alive. It’s going to be a great day.'” – Paul Henderson