“I’m not a tie expert, but I can tell you with confidence that it goes around your neck.”

“Wearing a tie is like putting a leash around your neck, and you’re just waiting for the dog to start pulling.”

“Never trust someone with a perfectly tied tie, they’re probably a magician or something.”

“Wearing a tie is my way of saying ‘I’m serious about this business meeting, but also I have no idea how to dress casually.'”

“Ties are like tiny nooses that we willingly put on each morning to strangle our creativity.”

“I believe the only purpose of a tie is to make sure your soup has a partner for the day.”

“Wearing a tie is my way of pretending to be an adult, while secretly still feeling like a kid in a fancy costume.”

“Ties are like accessories for your neck, you know, because your neck really needs that extra flair.”

“The only thing a tie guarantees is that you’ll have something to blame for any spilled coffee accidents.”

“Ties are like little fashion reminders that we have to conform to societal norms, or else face the wrath of the HR department.”

“Wearing a tie gives you the appearance of being successful, but it doesn’t actually make you any better at tying knots.”

“A tie is a fashion statement that says ‘I don’t trust my own shirt buttons to keep me covered up.'” SMALL QUOTES OF THE DAY

“Whoever invented the tie must have had a grudge against necks.”

“Ties are like straitjackets for the modern office worker.”

“I have never seen a tie and thought, ‘Wow, that really completes the outfit.'”

“Wearing a tie is like wearing a colorful noose, with the added bonus of having to adjust it all day.”

“The only purpose of a tie is to give your cat something to play with when you get home from work.”

“Ties are like mini power cords that we plug into our wardrobe to feel more important.”

“I like to think of ties as a personal challenge to see how long I can go without spilling lunch on myself.”

“Ties were invented as a solution to the age-old problem of ‘how can we make business attire more uncomfortable?'”

“Ties are like miniature quilt covers, except they don’t keep me warm and I have to wear them against my will.”

“The only thing harder than tying a tie is trying to explain to someone why you’re wearing one in the first place.”