FUNNY NEW YEAR QUOTES

“My New Year’s resolution is to stop procrastinating…starting tomorrow.”

“May your New Year’s resolution be strong enough to last until February.”

“An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.”

“My New Year’s resolution is to eat more healthy…but I already deleted the pizza delivery app, so it’s too late now.”

“New Year’s resolution: Avoid meeting people who ask about my New Year’s resolutions.”

“Cheers to a New Year and another chance for us to get it right…and lose our gym memberships by February.”

“My New Year’s resolution is to be more optimistic, but I don’t think it will work out.”

“May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions.”

“I can’t believe it’s been a year since I didn’t become a better person.”

“New Year’s resolution? A gym membership that will last until January 18th.”

“New Year’s resolution: To be more selfless, but first, I need to buy myself a bunch of presents!”

“This year, let’s resolve to pay less for things we don’t need…and more for things we don’t need either.” WOMEN WHO WORK HARD QUOTES

“The only difference between a New Year’s resolution and a dream is the date.”

“New Year’s resolution: Spend more time at the gym, so I can stress eat without guilt.”

“Cheers to a New Year, where we finally do what normal people do and realize we can’t keep our resolutions.”

“New Year’s resolution: Embrace laziness and never look back…from my couch.”

“Here’s to another year of pretending to be a responsible adult.”

“May your New Year’s resolutions be as absurd and unattainable as mine.”

“My New Year’s resolution is to be more spontaneous…but not like ‘spontaneous-cleanup-my-house’ kind of spontaneous.”

“New Year’s resolution: Drink more wine. Because no good story ever started with someone eating a salad.”

“New Year’s resolution: Be more awesome than last year. But since I’m already pretty awesome, it’s going to be tough!”

“May all your problems last as long as your New Year’s resolutions.”