FUNNY OLD PERSON QUOTES

“I’m not old, I’m chronologically gifted.”

“I’m so old, I remember when emojis were called ‘hieroglyphics.'”

“Age is just a number, and mine is unlisted.”

“I thought getting older would take longer.”

“I may be getting older, but at least I can still remember where I put my glasses.”

“They say age is a state of mind. Well, my mind might be old, but my jokes are timeless.”

“I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, just to be sure.”

“I don’t need Google, my grandchildren are my personal search engine.”

“I’m at that age where my knees crack more than my jokes.”

“I tried to join an anti-aging club, but they wouldn’t let me in. They said I looked too young!”

“Age is just a number, but in my case, it’s a really high one.”

“I may be old, but I can still rock the socks and sandals look.”

“Remember when ‘happy hour’ just meant taking a nap?”

“I’m so old, I remember when ‘selfies’ were called ‘self-portraits.'”

“I’ve reached the age where ‘happy hour’ is a nap.” SAD INFERTILITY QUOTES

“I may be old, but I can still pull off the ‘shuffleboard champion’ look.”

“My mind says I’m young, but my body reminds me that I’m not.”

“I’m not old, I’m vintage.”

“Growing old is mandatory, but growing up is optional.”

“I’m at that age where an ‘all-nighter’ means not having to get up to pee.”

“I’m so old, I fart dust.”

“They say laughter is the best medicine, which is why my pharmacy is filled with comedy DVDs.”

“I’ve finally reached the age where my back goes out more than I do.”

“I may be old, but I can still drink like I’m young…it just takes me longer to recover.”

“I’m not old; I’m a classic edition.”

“Being old has its perks. I can hide my own Easter eggs.”

“I’m not old; I’m just retro.”

“I’m like a fine wine – I get better with age, or at least I like to think so.”

“Age is a funny thing. The older you get, the more you realize you don’t know anything – and you don’t care!”