FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT WORKING IN AN OFFICE

“I pretend to work as long as they pretend to pay me.”

“The closest I’ve come to a nine-to-five is watching The Office reruns.”

“My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home.”

“Work tip: Stand up and stretch occasionally, because sitting too long can lead to confusion. Like, who is your boss and why are you at work?”

“I always give 100% at work: 10% on Monday, 23% on Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday, 22% on Thursday, and 5% on Friday.”

“My office is like a circus: Some clowns, some jokers, and a lot of animal-like behavior.”

“Workspaces were invented so people could avoid actual work.”

“The only thing harder than working is finding a productive way to procrastinate.”

“Do you ever just look at some of your coworkers and think, ‘How are you still allowed to be here?'”

“I’m not saying I hate my job, but if it were on fire and I had a bucket of water, I’d drink the water.”

“The key to success is to focus on goals, not on a coworker who keeps stealing your pens.”

“When I say ‘I’ll do it,’ I really mean ‘Someone else should do it, but I’ll take credit for it.'” BIBLE QUOTE ABOUT FREEDOM OF SPEECH

“I’m not lazy; I’m motivationally challenged.”

“My boss asked me if I could perform under pressure. I told him I’m not a plumber.”

“I’m not bossy. I just have better ideas than my coworkers.”

“I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.”

“The best part of my office chair is that it swivels, allowing me to look busy while accomplishing absolutely nothing.”

“If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, what does an empty desk signify? Unemployment?”

“I may not be the smartest person in the office, but I can definitely pretend to be.”

“Coffee: the most essential tool for surviving mornings in the office.”

“The office coffee machine is the real MVP. Who needs a raise when you have an endless supply of caffeine?”

“There’s no ‘we’ in team. But there is an ‘I’ in sitting comfortably with my feet up on the desk pretending to work.”

“You know you’re at work too long when you start switching your computer’s screensaver with your bed’s background.”