![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrU3BmVStIampBSktsOEJ4RjdJeEFoT3dvaTRWdDM1aUFHSHpZUTJ0K2RTamdaWEV2RHBnc2h1Q0hwTEtYdEVJeFdUMytTVUd4WENENDhiTmozRERHWEl2STNsZElQSTlUZWZyVFpod2FaS1I%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(ae20bb1efde33baf63dcfdee10a112e4).jpg)
“I pretend to work as long as they pretend to pay me.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVkY1ZTRNWG5MV0JLUFF2R1loakExOGhHMXIzMXNMbGxEdjlyWGdmZjdSU3dHdndQSlE0WDFpMmgrMHZOM05BTkgyWmFiZnVGSlJFL21RNFN5N0hZeC9pVGI0ZlhVeVliaUxzaUd6QzhnRGlOS21uOGk0V0Y3cGM5djZYN2lDUjlBPT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(6dbb2c981eb600d19947d17f4380cb47).jpg)
“The closest I’ve come to a nine-to-five is watching The Office reruns.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUS9aekRQZWhFS1pKUW00WDVvZFQrVUNCR3UzbmpISkhBeEJIWDVZQm5rMmd6aXZaU09yTGg5RzhWMHhTalF5L21mOWlWVGxQbnBqbS9lYkluWUV4ZHk0eXlCR3VyT0ticExEU1RELzJZTzk%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(5ec4bf292564120826fef0ad63e362d8).jpg)
“My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZjFQZWFHbk1UVEVhWDZLNWt1TjhlcVJaMmRDeTRYcnphUTU0cGU1THFoNjd5OWoyVjNDS1NoZXk2cGdQTjZxb21GMEN4TzBhYUt2THBlL0tqcU9UekhoMU1LNVp6ZG9zZW5GOS9hU0M3U2pPL0VTeWtvTk00WnZWRkFqSklPTTRhZ0JOMlU3b2xnczZwNW1WSzhRZ2UzZ3dVS3BFMjlyMlI2d3F5V01Fb2ZPTmUwV1NlVXdVOGdjd2lPZHZUMzkvV0l5QkloaDRWVzJSdmQ3SVZYRTZXTT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(487ed3b20f623d7803f4b70bb4b068ae).jpg)
“Work tip: Stand up and stretch occasionally, because sitting too long can lead to confusion. Like, who is your boss and why are you at work?”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVEl4U1ZwT3lsT1RmZmoyMzFtcGNZVlQrcDhwNEdKL0RNdWVxMmNsTzFHQ1FLc3A2TC9wK2xHZTY1S1cwVXVSbWhKTWNab2tmUXBJUmhRYW1HYXpUaEV0b0NMenNmU3grM1UyNWg5TFVxZ2FhYzRpMlg5M25FUkd4MUI5NDBDRUwzRDY1aVZSMnJibzRlQ0hDenV2a2dBOExxRENYM1pZRStZMEtrZW1hWU5T/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(833eef2aa1a90c6a1267375303d9cece).jpg)
“I always give 100% at work: 10% on Monday, 23% on Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday, 22% on Thursday, and 5% on Friday.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZitCNC92YXVzeENTaitzN0pUK2hxeTNEQ0RvcWNuc1gxWDZYdmpGOHBEdThSQjdueW5PdnpWMmJjU014SWxvNGlqTjVKb05lZHVFVzNCYnRPMTg1a0ZsNVhpVnFaOEFTdlNld1lQeTBkeUJPd0ZRVjFwNTRMcWRmWnNyM1FNb1hrMWpaK3lIRHNZdWFoRy9QN2lQeWFZPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(3a3dbeafc451a746ab69e895e6858d1e).jpg)
“My office is like a circus: Some clowns, some jokers, and a lot of animal-like behavior.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZmdPaVJpWTMzYnlwYjNFUmJFSTBrWkltanpKK3ZxR0NMeExFaGhpVnUwN1BwRUJPN2kxV3RqWG1RbVkyMWc3aVVnUHNaOWpQQno3UjRjWEVGc1VFbFBZVitFQ2k2dEVtcE00eWE0NWNZR1k%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(b8a4794d2852b30c3aba41126eae9e5b).jpg)
“Workspaces were invented so people could avoid actual work.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZkJYSmgzZVh3S21nU25NN2VZWEZDZ2oyc3FEbmUxejBZcmxrZEgyM2R0K2JVNFFZSVNYbmJiZVEzTk9PcWFRK2pUMWlhYWJKTmRVOFRodVFtOVdpSWJiN0JoRjNYMGU3ZEU5QTBDekJQbkF3QjZ2NVlvdXcxMnMvZm1vUUorZGpnPT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(b158caff95207d21bc5675c183796e77).jpg)
“The only thing harder than working is finding a productive way to procrastinate.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrYWpvU2NDOENWVG1FQWZRTGF0WUdLS0k4dTJTNlM2amY2c0tWTTl3NDlidFdETHJHeHRKR2JoZTQ5dmFyMldaaHl6ODNaUUVWNTRnUkJnZndJWDF5eUJHWlY2MFdXQkNJY0N5WGRDQUlyMzhPQWwxUy9BVmt1aE9VNFpLYklCT3F3Njdoc0pUdVRUNG1qV3lBNGk0czRibFRHUDk0ckhCZTVraVRmSUpEQnpn/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(0d3b99680ffe2b08f8c506e78e2b4416).jpg)
“Do you ever just look at some of your coworkers and think, ‘How are you still allowed to be here?'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRmSmp0Q2ZWUnZGOUpMeTZGRzBRZU5QU1p0dld0RWhIS1NTTWJRVGNNZ0RhOFd4d2wzMjJ5YzgrMENwNlJxajk3dWtQYjVMclhWVHRNeVphREUxZEZkTGxiWFdQVEV4VXhrQ0FUcjJLaEVMSUNSRmNOMk4xVGg2dzV5RUdIYWN2bXNteUpSTmZaSU9oZDhOemM0YnlwdVQxazd6cUdYSWEzYlZhUWxPckZFYm84R0dGclcrbUJFK3FOTG1mMTZZUT09/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(400851691e6c5142c4dd903e766667b1).jpg)
“I’m not saying I hate my job, but if it were on fire and I had a bucket of water, I’d drink the water.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWDRkelpFVURTV2FXRk1UMk9vbzlmM1g3UHFBa1Q4WDBuTi9EVUE5MkhLK3R5RXBnSXRyRmF2UDNuWFBFTG1XbGY3a2NoUGNBelJQY1V5UTJKQllZUzFTV0VmdzFXNnVQZmxlbWF2aFRUY1lkMWVEQ2RsOXhMb3RUNFZsRzBJZ1JvRFRkRnJ4akh0UzV4K2R2YTBHS3hRPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(e18bb462f349a3638befca586dd2a513).jpg)
“The key to success is to focus on goals, not on a coworker who keeps stealing your pens.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUS9OL2Q2cy8zbm52di8ydGxWNW9zV1pCRzhiNjI0UXB6c2p0Sk5WUVI2bHhYOGFxZXpUQTI2SGNFTWVWNWtCSTBvQ3RtaDlaZE8yT2M3QWd3dmlzYTVmR0srL0tneDZDUk83akJrNlVDbENlWWkwT3BlaVNwZVZzTzhqdFg0Q1J0SkJBYndSUm90a0x4U1Z3Q0h2Q1NTdWtsS05RNnpFWXJrdDlycll2Y1B3MzFJY2dBM09nRjdGSnpFbTBxSVdPNGZmVDUvTUJDaTBLVGdWRisxZ3RORXFtMFRLYUd2ZkxLMk5oNC9laFZOelF5OHh2S0ZMSkl1SlN2eWRSQkppQlE9PQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(f110daef6cf96534b9eeb62a1bc112fd).jpg)
“When I say ‘I’ll do it,’ I really mean ‘Someone else should do it, but I’ll take credit for it.'” BIBLE QUOTE ABOUT FREEDOM OF SPEECH
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRmSmp0Q2ZWUnZGOUpMeTZGRzBRZFBobU0rMHJBUE5GWS8xVFpmejlpbnlCVkNPc1Vka0hwZDYrc1NhTFFsUExVZHFOMnlzSlozLzNzQ1BzSHlsMDNRcVdaT2NaT0krdnZPTllzRGdYbWs%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(eca97464eb35fb5df0fe98944cdc4613).jpg)
“I’m not lazy; I’m motivationally challenged.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUS9aekRQZWhFS1pKUW00WDVvZFQrVm1mMGxmTWIyQ0tvUHJiZitHZmhPdCtFQWhVUGJmWlpmTmRuVXFhNThOTmJrdHVWc3ZicEdvSzhMNTgxbzRDNVF1YjZwa2ozZ09TK2ROSmhkdWFzWXhJdGdhL2J6Y0Ztc25UVEJWaE4xdlBYZmJRV3ZJZWwzUXVxZ2NLRVBnRlhZPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(12a041dbc7c0a2bc27c1ce66c03808d5).jpg)
“My boss asked me if I could perform under pressure. I told him I’m not a plumber.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRmSmp0Q2ZWUnZGOUpMeTZGRzBRZk5wK29JM3ZHWVhIQlpWYmx6YjVDbmJ2a2xTd3REbWY5VnU1MCtTcGZtQ0c4bkZ3ZVRqSHRIdVE1ajlGUVRqY254bys1SHFWYzRkSUcvU0pLN1pPTy8%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(32e0257f5d5adde523d36fc80f97b0a4).jpg)
“I’m not bossy. I just have better ideas than my coworkers.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWHVkVWgvUmV5TzBINFJPZHB3QlBUdWZHdUdTV3dYSUh5YjFTRVFBdkVWamVnaGIvVDI0TXA0dWdPMkgrU3lrVkJLZHZYS3hNYzA0dUFwTlBQSld5Mll6VTRuVVcxNGRrNFlvbVlTTXlzQmNyajUzL3JtMWhuYzFyUDdseTJGSFhQOTlieUwySXpDM0FubFVzRGs3VEpZPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(fb44c4a02576ea8c0d852b112f030667).jpg)
“I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVXN0cHFIUk1KWCtGVk5oa2VxNG9vcXZrN0s4NWgrcWRpbVQyNmF5R1BPbVg5UER4eW5Vb2ptd1QrN25ZSXBjeWUyOGR1K0FnaG95bWVzNHBxSEg3RnJ2eWxVWkxGZVJoWFFLRkJCQ3YrVTRpQTBvMDVrTXBzNWp2MXZSMVhYNXVmalBlcHNUVUtZMXMvTWRRZmNKM1BuOXUxREIxN0lWWVBmSDNQdDhkT0VFYzEvQ3dUd3RBR09sQVlMa0RoU0htQT09/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(89e8223ca89f0a929763bb1f7a6f821c).jpg)
“The best part of my office chair is that it swivels, allowing me to look busy while accomplishing absolutely nothing.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVURFblIwUmtVcWVleFh6ZnFQWlhtdkVKTDB4ZkZDTzBMcjlZbTFFdHZGdE8xUzJGK3NlZ21IbE85ZGNITDkvcXVxMmgvbVVVRFg1d1ljRytrdXhZR3hZTmR2L3VVcXFxWVErTTJjb0RuSVFjaFliMmVNVGhIV0xxU1h1VUx5UTJGWkl1MWZrS0oyUE4rSTh6LzFkczZBYnZtQUZmNWlsRmVhNkhIMlRPWlhE/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(9fa129a4c46e324753aea0545883a542).jpg)
“If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, what does an empty desk signify? Unemployment?”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrU0xMZHdjbG81bGx4UnJ3MnlsVE9EdEp4Wm9wZDM5dFRKMmtsdy9FV29iZmJCdmZGTDYvdTJSNXpOcEgrUHpkM0s4RWdIaGd0a2ZYWjhYVXlPL2tPMVZMeHZyWnpmY3QzUVF4cHVCTzcyMjlJS1h4U1hlamJCS3gvRU5saXVzQU8wNUd1Qm5nZDlkaCt5NE9HZnlOQjJnPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(4027622bb4ac7214575ac04d21ca6a15).jpg)
“I may not be the smartest person in the office, but I can definitely pretend to be.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVlJqWi95RE5GZVoxZG9ILzYxbG9SeTZHcHBrMWVjaEVZNnR3MlZBaDJYakpWUnRkcENxN0c5eFdKVTBoQmoxWnJTcHhyWDBxQnF2dTJrbktYdzNpQ2ZyWlF6cnlPVUp6K3VCU2s4cXowajN5S1lYaVI2Qk9DYXVtSGl4NGt6ejR3PT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(ddbdd6c1bef1b7bf4424e3049a29b65c).jpg)
“Coffee: the most essential tool for surviving mornings in the office.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrYjlid1VMRFVZR3NRZkt5M3lnbGR6Q1dDK1VHMzNXN05MR0VxU3ZRam9YRWVYajhRV2xLVEF1ZU1oM3YvNUNlZVRQS2ltc3NnOVl5VmRhOVFJUGpMV2lQUzhGek5Kd1ZkMkpoVU5BeTBPV29zaFJ1M0wxQVBoV3doaWZPci9JMTJuL0FkWXZ5QmdhOVdqTnE0RW5oYk5jcjBkVzZjWTVheFBCMk9vWEFZWWc2/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(79a193b8e698bdb49384de58fc8673e9).jpg)
“The office coffee machine is the real MVP. Who needs a raise when you have an endless supply of caffeine?”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWnJGd3RHSTdrV0w2THhTSUFBZjlkNzlqV1ZrSE5wOVJKdHQ3RWQ0UkNQWFBvTEttejFERGZKQzFOa294dkQrN3BGdjNZRzBILzh3UU1xSUVVcWxhZFQ4VGZibnpOd2ZWazFPbmFTeElpdHJiNlhvSk1rSkRKb29rbGxyV3RDb1NJWEFGTnRTZE13MGlOb1JVeVo4WDBmTENoR2ZDd0F5RWtDM0tkRWtRd3NHeVRZdkFib25iaS81WGlVeFNLTTVmMDE3RkhHYVhmRnFZNjN5WENaM2JWYWVHNkRiVHk1WC9VQXNuUE5RRTl2eg%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(944f73c66dd64751f498f3fb48e10b4f).jpg)
“There’s no ‘we’ in team. But there is an ‘I’ in sitting comfortably with my feet up on the desk pretending to work.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrYkNWNXFST2JYUXY1WDRGalRmYVhLL1pxa01uS3VVVlc0dE5JVFEzdkM3L1JBWWZFYkQ2dENQZEplZjQwUUNoTnNGUENrd1JXOUt1STh1Smg1OFJ3OFM1aDI0TWZvWGt5ZG5vZ29uc0ZLaHJBTm9Bd3h3cUovdkd3MDgxR0pUY3lyRzRsKzdIM1c5ZXFiRDJxSlVWdjFmeFQvOHZleDdCSkE0Vk9FTVhBTGI3QVNVU3RnY0lCWFIyQVhYbjMxUGlvYnBWbm9vSWJoT0JHa1lUZXVNcDVXUT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+ABOUT+WORKING+IN+AN+OFFICE/(cd35307fec7c0e20668a0bd835167edc).jpg)
“You know you’re at work too long when you start switching your computer’s screensaver with your bed’s background.”