FUNNY QUOTES FOR A BRIDE TO BE

“Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.” – Oscar Wilde

“Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won’t even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.” – Helen Rowland

“A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.” – Michel de Montaigne

“Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.” – Unknown

“Marriage is like a phone call in the middle of the night, you wake up startled but still somehow happy to hear from them.” – Unknown

“Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings… and lawyers.” – Richard Pryor

“Behind every great man, there is a woman rolling her eyes.” – Jim Carrey

“Marriage is like a workshop, where the husband works and the wife shops.” – Unknown

“Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, you need two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade.” – Unknown

“Getting married is like trading the adoration of many for the sarcasm of one.” – Mae West

“Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.” – Gary Busey

“Marriage is like a walk in the park, Jurassic Park, with a velociraptor chasing you.” – Unknown

“When a girl gets to the altar, she leaves behind her hope in everything but wedding cake.” – Unknown

“The secret to a happy marriage remains a secret.” – Henny Youngman

“Marriage is a three-ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.” – Unknown

“Marriage is not just spiritual communion, it is also remembering to take out the trash.” – Joyce Brothers KEVIN GATES QUOTES ABOUT LIFE

“Marriage: An endless sleepover with your favorite weirdo.” – Unknown

“Marry a man who laughs at the same things you do. Otherwise, you’ll have a very long, boring life together.” – Jill Shalvis

“My spouse can’t understand why I’m laughing when I’m watching a romantic movie. It’s not the plot; it’s the thought of two people kissing without eight takes.” – Unknown

“If love is the answer, can you please repeat the question? And remind me what was the question again?” – Unknown

“Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly.” – Voltaire

“The best way to get most husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they’re too old to do it.” – Ann Bancroft

“Women hope men will change after marriage, but they don’t; men hope women won’t change, but they do.” – Bettina Arndt

“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” – Mignon McLaughlin

“Marriage is like a game of chess, except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke, and no move you make will have any effect on the outcome.” – Jerry Seinfeld

“The secret of a happy marriage is finding the right person. You know they’re right if you love to be with them all the time.” – Julia Child

“The most important four words in any marriage: I’ll do the dishes.” – Unknown

“Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is the husband.” – Unknown

“I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” – Rita Rudner

“Marriage lets you annoy just one special person for the rest of your life.” – Unknown