![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVmtmUFFyUFpGZUpSRHlKRGxWVExKSTk4NnMwcXJjNGVOdzR2VXBDbHpFNVBNUHB1L1BURU80ZE01eGtrWjQvL25JQjNnOXhxbHJJQ3lXUENqYnl5c0svVEpQR1huNzhPOWxkQzRHOEwyaXN4blRmVW5pcHRxMjFoMlNIWXlEc1lRPT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(e294c950394009592c1f1f682dd0d6b2).jpg)
“A day without laughter is like a pencil without lead.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVVJkc0FkQlV3cEpxK2lSbjgyeXZFelVwUmVpcHFqdFQ0VkhpbGlvWkdlRk83RENramRNMGNXV3ZxU1oxRko5OUtsOXc3THF5Q0E3aWRDNTFnQ0F0NEQzSGNoRDhsL3hUUTJqUUU1MU1GSDRYYVNlRnNkcGF3VzBudGxDZms4N1RVV3RYTHdnUWhCRzZ3eEo5R2F1djZZPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(f0e073706d6441b082d992dfced483c8).jpg)
“I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrY08wL3JXUWw2QytWWEFUWUpxQmh0d1dQMG5tRXV4T0NiWUl1Ukt6TUE4T2dsRWpaU2k5OER3cVZEOFFyWTYza0ZTN2tocFg4bDBrTnduckJVaWlvd1lJZGlkdzAwMVU3d0gyb3AycEdPZnBVcG5ZQWdJdDJET3BKVk0vZnYyTWhKTk9NOXo0SFRNNU1VSjdCRFcwQjFUaFQyQ1M3VDBza3NGZ09zSzJqZ3BN/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(a0ce1b59990fef5d43c23630ef51c276).jpg)
“If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrV3dXc0gxMG1lcDNaNG5SeVdETlVEVlhqSmxFdjN1Uldpd0NUNW9ETVFQY1RRWCtrZUVmUEJzdVpSTHdpSWNJWmJkZG0rRWZYTzhzNnVPeDBZWkNjU0dLd2ZzTnVtMXJUTUU5YnJtSVB1QXRjV3l5aFFpTytQWWtXWEZPd0thd0RJei9MaFRHVG1DWWJpbTRhd3ZoWGxlbnhWTUdvT0pvTFpBc0dGbldIanhTV2xSRGV1N01JSURQTmYyQ1pQd2xLdz09/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(cdb26ded4cc152b44c8831d6c7155e75).jpg)
“I asked the librarian if she had any books on paranoia. She whispered, ‘They’re right behind you!'” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUkVBOExIaHdySHM2eVFNWjBCQTBteE5ScjNva3dTWVE4ZHVXVWorN3RTQ3ZuUVl2ZUdyTTZaWmRKeUdyT1ExN0FLazBIUThQNEk0QkVLdDR1ZVJ4MlBxcWRWdDQwQlZCajNWdUg1cHNNdFZHSlQ5MGpGUkhrTUszc2I3eCtIbEpRPT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(64598b2979a9fa91b1eb252c86c2dd94).jpg)
“I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUjQxN2pUVmhYM044N2Q4WEp1TG5CNEFEcUg2bVQ3b1ZpQ3NPL3ladytOcXNDdW03UjBIRUU4cWdBNFd3WjZSWlJqaytaY1dLRDlQaDczR2VOZUJVK0xHVmJjcVo0dTU3ZU0yWG5QUlhxS0V2OS8wWGF4dm5XSjY2VE5hNzAyeGI5WWV4OTFZVmpPN2RjeHYrY0RaU1M4PQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(ffac8c2a356e98916a09757fa7a34c3e).jpg)
“I finally got eight hours of sleep. It took me three days, but whatever.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrY3NXNExFNjNiMWs5UDlKOVJyZlVUcjV5RFdPeXdiNUQwMnh5NXdNd1ZtVXloeG5DMXVhM1RaVnl3NjBvRVpEdmJxWlFNbEhVU2JoTDhrcWRGTzA1S1VYdVFXalR6RlhVS1dlNmZBcWJKUEVnMkZLd0JqSDRDWlFIZVZMK250d0ZxSC9udllQc1RWWklFL1U4YXErbGV3PQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(4e23802fab3949f02cb7b1050653254d).jpg)
“Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it the most never use it.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrU2VCNWdSTFRNbDU3bjFKS2tOM0NTb2JVNTdJMlozQnVBRVYvN2kzSFBRaWljSW1YQzBIbENnZUdhZjZnUHE3bkRMSWx6WmJoTG43WnhBUEl3dTlxUEg5TlYvM3BkS0c1OW5ucERSN1h5NnRqMVRWeTJEazNMcGEyL1NlSUFWQlN3YnViVUFkSVkzVHg0amsxYzRhKzNFeXB4MnBrWk5VRFcwejg5Y296THRRM09pRGNoMzUzbTlvTFF6N1BSTWtUZz09/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(8e946ac51f6f1a1f7aae6164983bad0e).jpg)
“The hardest part of working out is getting out of bed. The second hardest part is actually working out.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVStEaVdreVBsZ1Jvbk9BQXMwTEtyUXJEc25tRFM3YWlLS0gvZyt3ZkVuSThFZ2R6Z3ZiclZMRzlRdDRoN1V4QmlFT08wTzBna0NvajI2a0NQUklWNlFwN3JiSHhieUdOYnlNNVBhZk1NeWZyQVlscVIrRDdQUWNjZFIyalZkYXZGa05PUUNDR1phZjNETUlFekg3eUZ4Qnc1b1Q3TTlZK3BzdUc2NW85OFJJ/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(57782c215cb7884c6d0c1b7a3dcde65f).jpg)
“Whenever I clean my house, I just end up making it dirtier. So, now I call it exercising.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWUhtam5XalBwQTFwYWFjRGpFRlhMbmcxTU5ORUI1MFB0eS92cU5uQkRIMXJENW9MMjVPenhIV2lXdFBwSTQrTnRPR0ZPYVc1VC9tSW4zNHN4Um8yUHQwdGpTT2RxczVMWWIycTVyZkFCTHVTQUY0Szh2SFE4VVhuYXV5cW9OUFFVTlhza3djNWZJZ2xkU095b3dzeU13PQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(2f9d44429e703ad2fc93b4694c2c7f79).jpg)
“My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrYzJVNm8zSjJHdVY1Szg5aUY0T0R4eXgwOFY4ci92OTJmQWhMdisxVU1IeSt2bStrK0pIV3Nwd2pBaHlpRzRzRTN2Qzk4SFFjUStrMWkrNWI2NDhTaEthQlVxWnFQMnVMVzQrdDRGMklHTk5NR3VvTGlmTUw2WDBYajdQcmIvc2lxV2tUanplZzNkaFdUMTFRb2FUSWtJPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(4b072e9f61548edc2173799245782ac8).jpg)
“If a redhead works at a bakery, does that make them the gingerbread man?” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUWx2bjk0TytUTGd1VkVuY0N6QnAveXA2eUJlWGoxMVRuV2w4cWpva3Y1cGhKYTkzd3BXL3g1TTVCcG04U0VLNlVVa01vaUthNGNjZ1A5SjZNbXR5UFBUVlo1dEltNnQwdGJUd2kvNTVIVUhKZm1hVHFMOWR0cnJYQlJQeVRvcVRTRjFPVkJoMVJrOFB3WlRqeG5DWStRYlhUMVFqVUF0dVhRVzgyQXFiSkwv/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(57e60f1d1a492f9aef81299cae44f6c9).jpg)
“Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!” – Unknown TAURUS SHORT QUOTES
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrYXRYRE1GTVZUckdSbkV4K05VdWkyZzR0c1lWMnpyVWZ3b3hESlpPZHlUR3U4eTFNd1BsNEgwMCtlRGVoTE9qYTVOcDRXZWJJclZoMlFYdmFENlFiVTRaeUhzbzlVak56MERLbjZIeVdCUGN6TjJYU2ZGdGJUWFY5QVlqK3NaSk5nPT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(9e39d5f4e113de94eba24338100e34f8).jpg)
“Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance?” – Phyllis Diller
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRmSmp0Q2ZWUnZGOUpMeTZGRzBRY0p5cU1nc215NDc1M0h1aWYvOE50azdpK0dKU3VYbkx6bDZwZE5lc2hqVzVaWXVVcU9STi9CNi9ybUpXMlNZWFhTV0luZnZNbU1TbFZwVnNhMWZ1OHo4Tk9hNSt1Wm94QWRtU0dwM0NhY3RodUdNMEQyUVZrcFdRdzRQMm5wYkdYQkUveStyK3V1S2FQVU1JRU10ZnRlZTdIVmFSaWJ1QlVXQkxjeU5lRzRwMS9XejQzY2ZweDQxNFh1ZGFxR0JlQT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(11941f836f8991adb70ce1d65e99bd7d).jpg)
“I’m not clumsy. It’s just that the floor hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrWk1kVktRSDJTbzhrb09EMENpTVhERHp4VEJDYnQwYjFtSmZsUDhNWmdqY3Y5MVFXbUpWR3VXMC85cng4dmlwYXUweElPZmdGZjVaOStCVUtPZVNEbWY2WFJjd3F2dnVVRkJtZ1lnZ3F4Vmp5TE5Ed2NNWXdXQmFKa1kyVXdBS1N2VlFkQklxaGNKVFFCQ1FJYmR4YmhYcjduS05uUWNIWmh1SHlneWV1REQr/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(2e2502c6560ecab8db7affcf2d310f6a).jpg)
“Out of all the lies I’ve told, ‘Just one more episode’ may be my favorite.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrV1UrLzNwNDhMYkF6eHZramFQNlJ5azZIQk13WXVydWo0c3QvMEd1cFVFM2NmMTc4d04vbTdldnd4c1l0YllabHV0UE16MVpsRVZmc1VTRzN6U3RWREJUd0tQTUUveUsxTDBxaHRGVWhuMnp3VDBoTmV6aHBrV1B0UGd0UmNLQ2U5a2J3b0c1WXRXRS95TFdmL3BjbXlmaXlTQXNsN3J6MmpYaHhjNjZ6WmZzNkdSelJ6Tk9td0kxMWczK2hiYXIySEdvSERnRExPMnZKRFdHRGF5SCtZRHhDam5CbWtuWmdYQlEyVFF4OVJwajFqNmk5S0lQT1BaNWg4dURMaGtKUVdNY1FxSnAreE1WeW9wYjZhRTk3aVFaMHF0UUhDWUJPWXh5OVRONFN0OUM%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(b510911f10b39cae891261dac7422043).jpg)
“I hate studying for exams, but I try to have a positive mindset. So, I tell myself, ‘I’m not going to fail. I’m going to baffle the teachers with my creativity.'” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVDlvSTR1ZG41ZzFuMVpGVStXN3R2Z3dubVFSa3pQYWtqV2h5RFh6WlpGZjFzKzE2cFdDOWdpQmZVdHYyQ0Q4RE9FYm9palk2c2N4ek54VmFYM1dxd24zM0VTTlgwZkc2Q1JKZzltWGNNci9mcWxwbmpnajdIV1VQY2RDLzFKMTExYVduc0dSbHRzMi9nUlQ3WW5ZVmM1dytLTU9rSWZ5SUg1ZFF0SnFBa3pJ/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(5b22cca2a2a6a90969e0c764ae0804f9).jpg)
“I don’t need a hairstylist. My pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVGk0dWthdkUxM0JhZE9SQTZVK0RvRFVHL2V5M3ZlY2t5VE9PTXZwNVZFV0pUOFVFRENKQy9IOEZCVE84Q1BHL2dwTWNvTlF3OGUxamt5Rmp6bkttNEwxVHVkOHcxYVdYVlhaMEFDcGJ0aTdDTzdlV3djL01paTl3NlFUbkdLKzhCVkFyWEhMTTl0STI5R1RxNTZkNEsyZEQ5SFhDN2IyMzFINktUUkRKOTNVRmFBWmtyNm9WRTl0aWR3RER6UWkyQT09/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(da032f0e7d7c8fd6858c845890dd5d2c).jpg)
“I love asking kids what they want to be when they grow up because I’m still looking for ideas.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVVJkc0FkQlV3cEpxK2lSbjgyeXZFd0Q4Z3o2b0F1NmJLRmJoUHZPQ0pXT1NMQ002emUyQU1hemlvRnZRNHc3bXhhY2s3bXFQalhBQkxwMUdjWXRkSGxZSm9Wa3JYZFQ3UkVaTE95MzBqNjVrUnc4TXFNVDRoM29Tc2hZeldZZEJEN01rTlBaQmlUY2RIaVVpSWp1dEE0PQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(e6c5796543191e14abc1a14c0e4d979b).jpg)
“I told my computer that I needed a break, and it gave me a KitKat.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrU0hJUU1qM08wbEJyQlg3R3k4MWlQZUIvZTF6QWxQTlFGbWk5ZGZYMFpMdHlzUFZETnNCOE4rU01HQWF5dndNUVZVeStHMXMwUUIyRDlvaUVQaEJiK3VkUW9Jb2lmRTBiaXpkRmdSRUN3am5yeGl3cEJCYjZPcXFONnJHeFAzTkp3PT0%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(2d8779d9b726a1ec615312273c7d0bf3).jpg)
“A clear conscience is usually a sign of bad memory.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVXRDTDA5OEdZTnJTaU4xbk9sMkFGUHRHbjZ1NFg0aFRpSHVEb3RmNEMybGIrUXIrOTBxbXRRSXVXNjErUTdxdURhRkt3WVZQeVArR0Q4d0VCWW5iVkhXZ09HTkF4SHBDbGMxS1dPdGpXN2h1U3EwbHNnNjFVbnhBVExvTTR0VzhtRWl2Q1hsR05WeWw3QWw2VnJWQnBZPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(b29a4a70cf91b5a38f0c4487d786f388).jpg)
“My doctor told me to watch my drinking. So, now I drink in front of a mirror.” – Unknown
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrZHRmSmp0Q2ZWUnZGOUpMeTZGRzBRZkphZWxiSUVyWlpBOUVTUSswejl4bXQ1eUg2SC9NdExDb3NMcVZoRE1WN2JKSzRkMUJPcktnVWNlOWNWdnJTM3AxVG1lcmlINjdHaWx6YXJpSWtJV2FCdWYxYnBaZnVaakZnQ2VMcjdWdW1ib0VNOUN4ZGptS0FwcldBNUJLc1NvPQ%3D%3D/FUNNY+QUOTES+TO+CHEER+A+FRIEND+UP/(e9497243e9b396c4ca71bb57be15e413).jpg)
“I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve already lost three days.” – Tommy Cooper