FUNNY QUOTES WEIGHT LOSS

“I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it…then I see my weight go up.”

“I’m not overweight. I’m just undertall.”

“My diet plan? Make all of my friends cupcakes. The more they have, the less I’ll eat!”

“I keep trying to lose weight, but it keeps finding me.”

“The only exercise I do is running out of patience for my weight loss efforts.”

“I wish everything in life was as easy as gaining weight.”

“I’m on that new diet where you eat everything you see, but with your eyes closed.”

“My weight loss plan is to make it a round number by eating pizza all day.”

“My weight loss goal is to get back to the weight I lied about to my driver’s license.”

“I’ve tried every diet in the book…the problem is, I keep eating the book!”

“I joined a gym and they said cardio is a great way to lose weight… so I bought a cardigan.”

“The best exercise to lose weight is picking up the remote control and actually using it.”

“Weight loss tip: Hide your scale. Ignorance is bliss!”

“I put my scale on a spring. That way it tells me I’ve lost weight every time I step on it.”

“I’m trying to lose weight, but it’s interfering with my relationship with the refrigerator.”

“My fitness coach told me to get in shape. I said, ‘Round is a shape!'” BEST CALLIGRAPHY QUOTES

“I thought I’d burn off a few pounds by cancelling my gym membership. Turns out, weight loss requires effort.”

“I bought a heavy-duty scale just to see how much I weigh when I’m depressed.”

“I told my doctor I want to lose weight fast. He replied, ‘Get out of the office, you’re blocking the doorway!”

“I lost 10 pounds this week…only 20 more steps to go!”

“I have a love-hate relationship with my weight loss goals. I love to eat, and I hate to diet.”

“I told my personal trainer I want to lose 10 pounds. He replied, ‘Well, cut off your head and you’re halfway there!'”

“I’m not overweight, I’m just under-tall for my weight.”

“I’m not a weight loss expert, but I can offer great advice on how to gain weight in all the wrong places.”

“I used to have a six-pack, but then I broke up with my personal trainer.”

“I thought about exercising today, but then I remembered I hate exercising…and I hate thinking.”

“I’m on the ‘see food’ diet. I see food, I eat it…and then I see more food.”

“I wish I could lose weight as fast as I lose motivation to exercise.”

“I’m trying this new diet called ‘get up and close the fridge door.'”

“Who needs a diet plan when you can just marry someone who cooks delicious food and loves you unconditionally?”