GAMBLING QUOTES FUNNY

“The only way to win at gambling is to own the casino.” – Harold S. Smith

“The difference between gambling and investing is education.” – Warren Buffett

“If you’re playing a poker game and you look around the table and can’t tell who the sucker is, it’s you.” – Paul Newman

“The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.” – Kin Hubbard

“The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.” – Anonymous

“Always borrow money from a pessimist. They won’t expect it back.” – Oscar Wilde

“Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.” – Ambrose Bierce

“The best throw of the dice is to throw them away.” – English Proverb

“If you’re going to gamble, make sure at least one person there knows how to play.” – Anonymous

“Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something.” – Wilson Mizner

“A gambler is nothing but a man who makes his living out of hope.” – William Bolitho

“The worst day of gambling is still better than the best day at work.” – Anonymous

“The house has an edge, but the edge is only effective in the long run. In the short run, anything can happen.” – Stu Ungar

“If you ain’t just a little scared when you enter a casino, you are either very rich or you haven’t studied the games enough.” – Jack Dugan

“The best way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.” – Anonymous

“Luck never gives; it only lends.” – Swedish Proverb MOTIVATIONAL QUOTES ON FOOTBALL

“I have to confess, I’ve always had a gambling problem. I bet my wife she couldn’t get ready in five minutes…and she won!” – Anonymous

“The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.” – Ambrose Bierce

“Gambling: The only sure way of getting nothing for something.” – Wilson Mizner

“They say poker is a game of skill. The problem is, nobody has figured out what that skill is.” – Anonymous

“If you’re playing a poker game and you look around the table and can’t see who the sucker is, it’s you.” – Paul Newman

“A gentleman is a man who will pay his gambling debts even when he knows he has been cheated.” – Leo Tolstoy

“The casinos are the same as banks – you give them your money and wait for them to apologize.” – Anonymous

“The urge to gamble is so universal and its practice so pleasurable that I assume it must be evil.” – Heywood Broun

“You know you have a gambling problem when your pockets are empty and your disappointments are many.” – Anonymous

“In gambling, the many must lose in order for the few to win.” – George Bernard Shaw

“Gambling is a tax on ignorance. You’re paying to know the outcome of something you cannot predict.” – Mark Pilarski

“The only difference between a winner and a loser is character. The winner will fall down more times than the loser, but he will get back up every time.” – Lance Armstrong

“The best bet for a winning gambler is the sure thing, and the only sure thing is that the house always wins.” – Anonymous

“Gambling is the art of separating fools from their money with style.” – Nassim Nicholas Taleb