![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVGJ3NWhSeWdFUTdsdjczWmFrRThPNnBjZWlGMHR2ekV2SWc4VDBqYkpFeUIxZzhwWWptT0dtZ3AycnZYcTdGRWdkT2J2QTJycE1jOUxOQ1RodGVlR2ROL1NJSDdrLzdwc3M5cSs5cHFFV3BpR2h2UVNPM1duZjZhR0VwMStBYnZGWVhqaUxDOXNkcllmci95cWNCSHgvb3NaZXNSdkNTbCtEeEdKSWNDYWNpNjIxOXJlcXFsczZDQUtTZlVsbnczdz09/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(a753163c679ea8f19280da3109772e9a).jpg)
“I asked my mom what she thought of my new hairstyle and she said, ‘Well, at least it’s not permanent!'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMkNrQngvVnUwTjJIMUhGMlRrVjkwblcrUDdBOUhmV2RIT0xrdTdzaVExSXNrTUtoOG9Tdm5wbkNPY1hvc2VoYWVmanlIWmJjREhVdnhXa1VzN05UZ3dvSVlWZEQrYmIzUjFXakxiMzJGZTZtNGdFN3Q0dXQ4dmM2djVjQ0t4MEpiUThUUVJHbUpSa252cXpjSnZ5Z0pFUmw5clJ1SFJIdVZGRURQZkE1MjNtZXBkRVVkVi81cFNPOFNtUXRzYkhaUT09/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(56a19377b84324617dd504ed9fe9bfdd).jpg)
“My mom always told me I could be anything I wanted to be. Turns out she was talking about my potential as a disappointment.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMnBPUGdEUnhEZ0hkeVJhMVBINXZqa092ZW53bmhVWTFOVWJ6ZEdXdG4wMk0xMktySGVLS1cwZTcwdVhabWtjZGVyTUdvellIUDdSSTliY1hiUkxlc0U1U3kxa3JqTmFteXlhWEg2QWRRbEZmNE41N2F5cXdKbHBNTDJzYjBxSzI4Q1ptWDZWLzNndVN2WloreWZSa2FJSGRMaEZmVkxGdlpGUm1DZ2s5VmY2YWhlZlBtUWEybUNXTnE1N0M5bVc3QT09/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(434a60b937a34e7e1a4f4808214053f5).jpg)
“Mom: ‘Money doesn’t grow on trees.’ Me: ‘Then why are there so many branches at the bank?'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMGpOYkRSck1za0NhWU9NWTArMHc4Y0tSaGM5Y0t4L3kwQjZYVTNpV2pESjREeXh5QlNkeWF5Z2pvVXh2Q0FoYjJHQUtCTlZwRXUzalVUeCszdDE5NUpENDVud2Z0K2FEU1h6akUrd2NLZFg%3D/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(3d41d7bed85868cf448b2863503b5a3e).jpg)
“My mom’s favorite exercise is running late for everything.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMnBPUGdEUnhEZ0hkeVJhMVBINXZqbnFxamlTbmVaVzhldG5JcHhYbGEyOWxLSDcrRkU3NkRkRE9YRHpQek1ZMDIrQnE3dEs3NTYwc3kvOGc2eDR5Vyt3d096d21ibHpLM1psbVdyVklRdUpBQlZWd0xHbERINDdDR0JicjJsV29RZG1vdHRGdHh5MlduQk5yK24ycHlEQzRjT3U5VUJMSkxCak1iKytaNFFPbi9sc1I1bFJaZDZRZTBsSHhQaW9FaUpUbGNWL0IzUWhmc3hFQ2F3MHdBVDUyKzg3Q25NKzNmeWczUlpuOXFETWwzTldFTFFTa0lxWWdJMTV3dXA2bFE9PQ%3D%3D/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(316f3a47aa628a1dc9582e2b10f826b1).jpg)
“Mom: ‘Make sure to wear clean underwear in case you’re in an accident.’ Me: ‘I think in an accident, my underwear would be the least of my concerns.'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMnBPUGdEUnhEZ0hkeVJhMVBINXZqbHNpYUl6WUJEU0x5QWdkMTFYSklVRkRNQjZudjdVeHduOW5mdmdrbXJrbDJuUS9ORk1mTURzREhzc3R4c3lmK0dhbXBrdHVOZnJrUnk5ejh6WWJKRGJQd1puTTd6Yi9DOG5uWjJ4NlZWS2FiV2tZZmRWZklGbGpCUjVtbUlWdTBDaExyZXAvSGdza0xFTUNGZERjSTNv/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(14e60dca4ed9cecd0aec3f259b8ef5b2).jpg)
“Mom: ‘Why are you always on your phone?’ Me: ‘Why are you always watching soap operas?'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMkNrQngvVnUwTjJIMUhGMlRrVjkwbVVscVl1SmcwZXNOakRvZHVBQTdhUUFPYkp6UUFLUXJMWS9IRGtMelBoTHNIVXVBbWt6aWJOc2EwUTNYZHhVUW0wMmpQV1lNUFRjM0tBbWl5NCtOZnQ5bjRkaFVPTmd2bFlrSTFCQ0VOZnNMNFdrTFRuRTZwbzJDZ1Q0OHhhUHh5c1YxVzQveHdHV0xHN3paalY3UVI5bTBVei9zbTRZVFI5ekFBMFk2cDFvRlN1ak1jWEFRUXBQZUtEUU5QdDFFUUxwQnNoTzlkbm5BbVRTZDYxRCs1NWd2ODkrY2Jlcy8yRS9NdXNST0g3SEE9PQ%3D%3D/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(82283ec316c0eb8768c2242d428e4d93).jpg)
“My mom always said, ‘If your friends jumped off a cliff, would you?’ Well, if they’re jumping off a cliff, they’re probably having more fun than me!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMnBPUGdEUnhEZ0hkeVJhMVBINXZqbTZ2ODkzMDdUcDI3V3VDVm04VmxTRnYrdnozM1NKODB2YnpCdjFuMklnY2g4S0R4WXRyeDN3QytWVmY2OUh0WndtK0RTRXMrWXZkTk5CTUNwblRMU1dSTzlDd3BaSUN5QnlYQTNsVnE3TEJQcWEySkxaM1A2ZHJiQ3IwbHpJRWJUZjlVbXY0MGt0c2RheDd4SFhXUkRHNkt0OGhXcWwyQkExeTN0TTVDaTl2UmVORVdxNFFSOWU0eU8zZm8wM0Y1bGNMMEdoK2w0dFVhUnpzZ2ZGVkhMUi9wdEZtOTk2TkJWVW9Ud1RiVVNwMmc9PQ%3D%3D/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(11e200c1101d5d0f76251264d2832a2a).jpg)
“Mom: ‘Don’t make that face, it will freeze like that!’ Me: ‘*Makes a silly face* Well, that would be an interesting conversation starter!'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMGpOYkRSck1za0NhWU9NWTArMHc4Y3BVbGNnTC9FS0NKVTBaZEVZWHFGWHZEOG9uKzg0Tm82NDZJUzRYYjA4OEx4VEpxekw3clU0K0I3WjdkWWZwOXJRYitMQ2c0b01zMzRWVmN4SlQxUi80MTRVRmRxbnVpTFQ0UXpYUkh2dXpDOWtTUzFMVE4xcXVXajNrMDlBMTJ3PQ%3D%3D/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(5f547feaa077f667cccabee8ca492ad6).jpg)
“My mom’s cooking is so bad, the flies in our house tip-toe around the kitchen.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMnBPUGdEUnhEZ0hkeVJhMVBINXZqa092ZW53bmhVWTFOVWJ6ZEdXdG4wMmhyUG9oaURXdHE2ZzdENXU3cWwvakYxYkJSV0RrMGxxOUZwRjNrbUdOZUhKVUU2eTdCb3lZZXd5RGI2V0VkUnVodUwyT09FZGw1Yy9OUjhVb0JUTGJVREZHT3FVaHRrbjAzZlpKY1l2WUg0TCtMY1lYcE9JNjQwSTd0Q3BQVERS/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(35f26eda7c40635d311130f8db943fea).jpg)
“Mom: ‘Money doesn’t buy happiness.’ Me: ‘But it buys pizza, which is pretty close.'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMkNrQngvVnUwTjJIMUhGMlRrVjkwbk9aL0F1YjFwK3VROG0xZWFXMUFkYmpsdlZXVFMwb1F2UCtpT3U3QTl5eTg4YlhibmhxOXdUcEtoTXFlU3U3YjBHaVJLTFlSRUNHVVZqSVg4cTVoa0pXYUZ5MVE0VHM5VDM1cWYzc00zelBZMjRrYjNxMnBrdWRYSGxLclg5RzdXT1ZkbmFVelhoaVpCWDJSdzl5c1NI/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(1030c20663693cfe0bb24845a870ad42).jpg)
“My mom always reminds me to wear sunscreen, but I still manage to get burnt just by opening the fridge.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMnBPUGdEUnhEZ0hkeVJhMVBINXZqbTUzQU0wbXFEWndiUzJrT2VMT09RN24xVk9YMU5TZHNIZDVUMUlhZjh4NWdhUkY2WkhtdlhMUjBtK1VtcVloSEdWQmhGeCtuaUVxa3FFbU5GcjJLREN5cHB1eVB0MVR5K0wrZjBFNk56YjdoYzRrVWZ1cGh4VldCNThvSFEwaHl1dkx0b1o5cVFhWDhBeUZsZy9jYkxjWkpiTUdXTkppOWNtZjBkd2JvQWdVYjB2WVRFTGV5UFpmVk9zVFd3WFhCM3hsN2RJcjhtUVZVUlhWbXBVTHBhbVRIZHhBTTNVaHphSGo5OWJIZ2FrMU1PaWFUUXpCUDdGNHRCVTcwVVFnR2ZLRUtJZFpQVXQxaVhma0ZvamQ1Nno%3D/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(94e30e13fd6ec06451ec1b05abc42987).jpg)
“Mom: ‘If you make that face again, it’ll stick.’ Me: ‘How lucky that would be, now I won’t need to worry about wrinkle creams!'” QUOTES IN SPANISH ENGLISH TRANSLATION
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMGpOYkRSck1za0NhWU9NWTArMHc4ZEZ5NlBtaFZrd0U1bWxMUXZQNnZxbUVjeGpodkdQOWlOMC8xWWRWR0FWSTNzSDdDS2UxT3NVeDJkZkJaR2dLWlNGbUFBZVN5bVg0TGc3QkxjQU1pRkY%3D/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(fe3a551b1e88924ee27f090647256d84).jpg)
“My mom’s idea of a balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMnBPUGdEUnhEZ0hkeVJhMVBINXZqbDF4bW5NYys1dWtIeE5Dek1jUkFzRFoxdFBPVDNiNi9WR01zeHUrcHJvbVFXUzRJRWdkTWVjZVJLREsxMGdjcWdZY1ZkWjhlQ3d2S2lLQlp2NnYxM1RKMW5uci9NbWpNQ2d5L1AyUUg2Q3MyRFpuS0JIWmJRenBNaGp5UGp5TnNKR2I2QVFPbk5saHowcmc2b0t6bkJCeHdIcUV4aXRuK1YzRWEyWkZjN2NqWDdCQlBYcmV4TUtHTkY3SjZjYWhFVDFETjltWGdCZksxRGUrNWhPL3gvUA%3D%3D/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(2c848e2724eef6625c77a7a3d0fa03d2).jpg)
“Mom: ‘You’ll understand when you’re older.’ Me: ‘I can’t wait to reach the age where I pretend I understand everything!'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMGpOYkRSck1za0NhWU9NWTArMHc4ZEVMRm9aWVdHcCtiZUdOcU50RkhIMzF3TjdpRHNweDhyOUc4d1ZYVEsrNW90ZUJnbFlTUEkzOE11M3JKWEpLdHNSOWRpcG1jMjdkT1ZCNWZpWENyN1BJQWRPc3ZoNHVHcnlWbmFJMzBuYmNPY2FvWVk3K3BMK2gxMVhUZ29uT3gxbkI4MXBNM3JPbjBrVGRPZHNLeWJoV2M3a21EMHZzaDh5dlg1NE1kNU1kUT09/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(b27ad431dae3511aae70eb9d50e0084b).jpg)
“My mom’s superpower is finding things I’ve misplaced… right after I’ve given up and bought a replacement.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMnBPUGdEUnhEZ0hkeVJhMVBINXZqazRUdklXRlRtVERMVWFwU0ZtVkNHUCtxZUZzbk80NjZxb2lCZG1kRkE4QndjaC9YWkk3YnhSc21aZ1VXU3JUOXRWUmZZRGpLQ3orOFcvMjUrb2NveC9BU0FsS3FXVmowRTh1MjBZSUE0MDNOUHd3VHplVlJKNlJaN0RnbW5jdDlVMEhXdWsvY2tacjE4dHI3aVc1cWVieVFrdXBIdWN2MFhEVFI4SHhKYTlRWEltY3JiSENnQy8vVUJqSDVTaXBmTT0%3D/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(0f107b40e53f363a8a09603c2d64fa6c).jpg)
“Mom: ‘When I was your age, we didn’t have smartphones.’ Me: ‘That explains why you always know where the TV remote is.'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMGpOYkRSck1za0NhWU9NWTArMHc4Y2JJMkNGc3d1TVVuTXFxRWhuVDV6Qldsb1lpRHJPSXJPMGxVa1VYNkViNjNBamcrSFJETkhUYS9pYmFHSzc1cXVpSHdGbVNpUHpaU3FnSEpjMS81SlhyTzd1QmlYMWtIdkFuUDRQMDhwcmpsaG54YzJHc0Uxa3hFUC91R2dIbi9hZW9jSE1iUlkyRnY4dTdVRzJYT3VMeGJ6V1UwZnlnVGNIMDE1NGVLWGNTVDdIVTN1ZmVIenlXRnhzSSsxNmVabz0%3D/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(88348dadc41da01387727e4a7806bb55).jpg)
“My mom’s favorite advice is ‘just sleep on it.’ Well, considering I can sleep through anything, it’s not very useful.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMnBPUGdEUnhEZ0hkeVJhMVBINXZqbVoybWxGUElvNVFZamFYOHVxSC9hWDNuN3UzN0xwcFBNcCttZ0xDUmJtcHAzV1daVlUrWHA3Wm9nK3dFUFFwSDRpZXVVaCt3M2JMVCttV3pFejh6ZFRURUpXbms0UU1ETnJYbDdOdjFxUmF6K2FaUDcxMHBzRWpQS3diMVR2azczQjhxNVl2ZDJSNXZ4TWZjODU3SEVWUTFvVnY3ZzFyY0FyQ1NiRGUrLzh4Zz09/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(54adb64184bad1e088a2032fc389f17a).jpg)
“Mom: ‘Always listen to your gut instinct.’ Me: ‘But my gut mostly tells me to eat cake, so…'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMGpOYkRSck1za0NhWU9NWTArMHc4ZXpOQ3hlTnVpeTJnbFNWT2t6Mmp6ZGtxWG9ZVVQrc3R6ejl3eEJxVkROU1BuQ25RL2dmM0JjQkJnZGhkY01DSzVHMG92N1JQVmFvSFdEdHlmQUFRaHExL21Rek9IMk5tZVlEa3dGTGQ3OVBwbU96cUEzd2haY01VR2RnRW1mNWdpWHdSc0dVcGg0UHFYdzhDWVo1eUhm/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(3b8f35de5ed1554384021e149e34d2d7).jpg)
“My mom’s shopping trip usually involves going for milk and coming back with half of a department store.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMnBPUGdEUnhEZ0hkeVJhMVBINXZqbElQR1ZaNS93b2U5T2hXSkh3aDdvM3RqQ3E0R1cveVNIOXNpWkY2QlRmeHkrWE9sS1h5a3RweHgxSWNqR3NzMWxrdll5Q2IwREpOclZvQVN4YjFnMFpxMkdmRmxsYkRjdWI2STBvNFduU3JZbTNycHkwU3lCSHltbDZsS20xRjh2VHBRR1pOM2ZEQTZjUVJoM1NIRzFQNjdSS1dxRXB5UzMrRzg4TUgycXJHQT09/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(31d500ac1be04fff13a646714aad4120).jpg)
“Mom: ‘Everything happens for a reason.’ Me: ‘Yes, and sometimes that reason is that I did something stupid.'”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMenowbUpMcjZlU0tra1QwSXZZa0RiN1NhSWFBR2VBcEo1NUhKOGZzU2NoN05ITklKa3dBSThFZExiRmJnSnlKclVyM2NYT0RQaSt5Mzk2cjI4dnZ3Z3FLTm16YnFwSmxVZ2NxYTRoYnNTckhoRGpQcVM3NmpRaG9Jc1FqRnhTZlFuV0tQWmFUSW5xaDZVTmU1S0pMZWtHbUp4MlNLeVU2cmZ1TmhHeGJxcGwzVmZkdmFRWDAvdGRvS3pJZlFnQi9IUT09/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(57aa31e804df835c89e0783d2b93568f).jpg)
“My mom has a secret talent for finding the TV remote in the most bizarre places. I suspect she hides it for the thrill.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMnBPUGdEUnhEZ0hkeVJhMVBINXZqbEhBT09ISlpoZVRFSXFzb2tvTnZsZFc3KzAvS1JzUGxxOGU5MWFaamxmckpLbWpwQ3l2cm9aMmZJQkhtZlkvV2VTUW4rZGY4K245K0tsbEtNc3Yyb0hPRlFDTU1DRFZlQXByNlB5OG5MVFRMcFhVaDdWalFTWlRMT2Q3RUhJUUlub1d0d3BSNTJFU21MdkFqYVp3d3p3aEFUUWNoQUVhL0l1MitDMmxCbTJoMU1oc3NnWTJOeTJiWkV6d2oyb2d1Yz0%3D/MOTHER+KNOWS+BEST+FUNNY+QUOTES/(e9811093a97c172484b03b1fd63ea05a).jpg)
“Mom: ‘Eat your vegetables, they’ll make you stronger.’ Me: ‘And here I thought lifting weights at the gym was enough!'”