![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrU2lPcnk4ak9FbnZSUXJDQW9LbGt0WlZCOEJKSms0amxBYTd0L1BSQ0w3MlFCWkhIQVRCNVJOMitrT2lKV0ZHdUE9PQ%3D%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(8c11d5bbe32cfdc47b18b389558880e3).jpg)
Here are 23 funny quotes from Prince Philip:
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMekFkUGhSVU8reEFJTnY3UmFIOVN4eUFYUEtxSkxmQUx1YTB1MWZ2SGs5R29sR2lxeVJYR0o1d1BJSWxKQ3AyODVPeUlpSmYrQnZDc3RyVWRwcWtISEk1ZFplS0hjRXM5K2N2aWVDVGlFSUg%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(ed00185abfe92790bac1deadbdc44bed).jpg)
“Gentlemen, I think it’s about time we got out.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUmYrN1lSNnFocHluQXFnckFtbE0rY2U1ZlF2UHhsNWdrbmcwaFVaMyt3WQ%3D%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(9a33f2e333e73066da9880603d90a9af).jpg)
(while at a recession)
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMd2hUSXUzcnlOYjFPYmN6U0ZROW5Cb3Q1STBDU0lBTmhUTnVUZ0ZZKzNNVXAxZVFTZ0RlN3oxdHo1TjEzODBkSi85eWtvZDBHVEV1VzZhZ0NtblpCK2NWNnZ5bDFLR0c3UGYxelVqQ0lOWVFxck94VmZpcUd3MytKWGtSYXJUcFVpc040RVlYV3hqeE96NlIxV2VOWkZVQVZOYmRzSitxYjEyaXlOTXlDS1hX/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(d8ebb79ab7ed3262cf063e112e1593b1).jpg)
“If you travel as much as we do, you appreciate that a good toilet seat is a guarantee of happiness.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMK1N0SitkTjZvN2grRHIrLzVHU2FXY3E4VlRocEZWNmpjempORnM2dStCUVFFQXBySm8rclJPYTE5QStFV3lsT2dDMVA3OGZwNE5oOERUaE1HZldwK1JoYjVsd1RsdXpjNllqQy9HSmZBWmNWRlo4cTVwY0dyaG45MmdNWHkxSnNPdXU1VnBBNWJPTzkwQ2lpU2RyTkFuYlBaZnVvSU9mOXJqRDRlT3FKQ1NTME1ETVRjYXBZRjkyMmJTaGQ0amV6VUI1S1h4cFE2VUIyQ0xGVkRPRE1pVT0%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(2c03ba643f40350517fa4f67741042f5).jpg)
“If it has four legs and is not a chair, has wings and is not an aeroplane, or swims and is not a submarine, the Cantonese will eat it.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMKzNXYXp4RlVZUUNrMWFoSlRtdHQ4RG94SXlzOGJQb2Y0eW5mWlJkVnVHSEdFYm9XaFRGTFBsb1p2SjJHeFd2SnpmQ3hiTWxiZjBUc0ZDSk4zVXhyR2hNYVJtbFV0UUlaayt4SXVXWVZZVHp1RkFVSWsyT3JpV0x2QlI3dnAvTWJBPT0%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(be4d78b342a41cba27c23a5f27b36d79).jpg)
“The Philippines must be half empty as you’re all here running the NHS!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrU2dWSEUrOTU2Tm5jS0tVOEREWmhIamJ4K3BoVi9vZkxFNUZlVllFT3l4eHQ5QjdHQzZFKzN4VzltVDFrZ1RxcThVeUJDbG5KeU9LSTZ0c2I4MENacHc9/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(d81c36289b236f6cf08e53931d673f08).jpg)
(during a visit to a hospital staffed by Filipino nurses)
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMejVDT0ZZeHdXWE9UdzRFMzJnZEQrOGRtSUpUV21qWUs1cUhxaldDanNvc0dZODJPRXdycDdSR3VncDFhaXV2MUtWUExZTnFWMkxsdjJzSUNGQUo5SEMvOGlZNGpabjZScjBkbi8zYWQvRnM2cFhlekZubkRiZC9RUHpCaUZCNFZRbHBzWklVZXRVYXRzRWpRRlJNaWhhUmhrN3JQV2lhak9sRGE3UXlpa1FhNFFvT2NsMHRoZjVidGcxTkRBN015QT09/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(1d470ac775ca17629f11b91b0d4d1fd8).jpg)
“It’s my custom to say something flattering to begin with, so I shall be excused if I put my foot in it later on.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMNlV4eXl1TExDM1BZNzhQTEVpVy9EcEIzc0pwUkFCbmxyM1JVOUp2Q1dxWHNwcDFwVzBKWUdzNTIxZW9ndDdhQjNUTWVKUkFPVGVodmNiQXhDYnpmVUk9/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(e8b79b129e352613ff5f782523e63792).jpg)
“I declare this thing open, whatever it is.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMGdlc2RDdGxwcXdYY25XME5sUlBaYnlQRHdnUWJyRTdqRXpJSFNRTy9QcTM1N20rWUsva2pUSHJRZldmSm1EL0FZT2RZUlVZalMwSVRsTHZrcmh0bmxGOFJtNHVQV2dDQUFjaUYzOU1SV2RxZWd2UjVLcTZhSzZHTXd0MFdyQXFEYWxqRFJjT1BoYSs3WTk1STFqbE1kai84VWxIMXNJZ3pnQzZqNGxTTVB2bzVaSW8vbVRTcVpzYUpjU2xuKzkzdz09/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(8dbdedd91f5a0d321bda1044bc741c1a).jpg)
“If you see a man opening a car door for a woman, it means one of two things: it’s either a new woman or a new car!”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMenZHYkRkL09vc2tqYUZ5VHd2MmR2YjR0anQxYzJybmhIcCtSZXFycnREbTdZelQ0VElTNTliVkF0eS85dG9jcWc9PQ%3D%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(100fd16b4f91e13a623113c251d459e3).jpg)
“British women can’t cook.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUVQ0eDdydHozeW1ySnZncTN5RG9RcUw3UXJDZlpvTVFkMlo1QS9aRTR2TnkwQ2xQcFRJUkpoQ3FoT2lha04wZXc9PQ%3D%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(456f71dec8322f8dd1cd8d7d082580ac).jpg)
(during a cooking demonstration in Hungary)
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMzUrdklkcjAwQWs2MFYzME9MOC95UjV6NVR0citaekRZbmpabncrMXErV3FtMTBXRlFEMkV5VE5EOGVEYWJuTXA2NXZMUzVwYXltRnVrOElNaERtUGE4OWVORVdTd0t5Tno1a2JGTHorV0gzSDV0VnI4MUthNkpmUXIvZC9VUDNDcWdvbUJiTkllQVRxU1lEVjM2MUdnPQ%3D%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(951ed798f41838eee4e1c51089b63ace).jpg)
“When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMNXNYS3JQaFNFZ0VJZzZkQ2JROUNOOFFHN3RtZEIrZHpCM1dyeEtucDdGSWNVTTlpalQ2TUFqRXd4NDNJaWdGcmVHUjRqRTI3N3ZCdC9BODdGeW1FQkNrZUtWcXR0VjhnU3VlUk9vRFg2Q3o%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(7c9ee98520e0b90b8fcde1b0dd88f098).jpg)
“It’s all about the beer and the free barley sandwiches.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMejVDT0ZZeHdXWE9UdzRFMzJnZEQrL3l4WmIyYWVJWXVkNzJhWG5McjdyRkJqR0pYR1A4RHAvQ2c5dHBSdittaWdZOVVOQjVBaktlY1FDMFNTUmgyOVdyaTk3S0h0Wmd4b1FXa3EwTXBSaCt1QmR3V25vNEc3YmdRS2FweFhpRm9ieGR0Z09TMXovNTJIaXpGSkg5RlY4PQ%3D%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(5dfc61d1e3a88a5e344965f3b3137a5a).jpg)
“It’s a pleasant change to be in a country that isn’t ruled by its people.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMOWtMUEk4VHFkK0RWSk5FK0ZoaWJyQWRFdFQ1RHA1VE9ESjMxTHV1LzNFN3EzTDY5VVZNek45THFmMVc1QkVhejFCS3kycEMvVVVDakhtSUhidEZtSWc9/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(2aaf8e88c5ab49de07b8d9f93a6e13a7).jpg)
“Do you still throw spears at each other?”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMK1p1bzMzZzZqL2Rwb2wrTnpmckREVzVMeHZMQ1p3emxTVmVUZ2RsUFRSZVh2amVUZjZma3pEM04xUDlnYVQ1Y3NIYUlpekU1ZStVNnZXVVZFTGxmc0s4UG1yZENQR0loS2RxeTdiTGNraU80NXV2cHVqUlV4bm1zRUhrcjJUbEtBPT0%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(48aafda3a131eeb5ab9de29783403aa3).jpg)
“What do you gargle with, pebbles?” 5TH DEATH ANNIVERSARY QUOTES FOR FATHER
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMNzNtakNMb09XZXcwclhydm95Q0tjV3I3NmhrSnhCak1saGI3RGNiYUFWZXE2ZnJvbGZxODdJT3pOd1hnSEV0RElseStuMm8xeWNST2dDcEMycmRMdTA9/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(2ebf9c6221e7af322d4aa38693faf9cf).jpg)
“You are a woman, aren’t you?”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrY1lpdUtsWnlIL1pGOERpYUg3ZXNQZ0x0RzhmejJUSU5vckFHeFBHSDJVZWNwWGpRNG5ic3A5QzAzOGthRXBoV3Rwd1VZeU4vSi9wUXdYMU9ScUZlNE09/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(86a22f5b87b5e16a53065b07968d4920).jpg)
(asking a Kenyan woman who handed him a small gift)
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMXB3ZlBtdEtqS3l2UmNKR2VRUlJIejVYVUNlc1BVVlZvK2t0NlVCZ0txMDN5UlNHd0lzQXMrcnBEdy82b2F1NERzOFYvZHpvSVBOMmdGUWNXbHVLMm9WMTVIZW5ianNWM1YrT1RpSklTOXVoUGNNVG5wVDU2c2s1VnhWUUtqSjBnPT0%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(522c993ff00078828a97681030b3b62a).jpg)
“I would like to go to Russia very much – if the bastards would let me in.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMFlXU0pFVUxuSGRLTEFpczlXWXBRQlRRVFMrYWljTUZFNXhsTVppM2tKMk8xaWlJaHNFL2JWVXhsVFR1TUVhU2NCUzVlTmlSUTRIQ3VobnFDaGl2aHdCdEgxamZQRUM1N0V0Qllob2FmUzM%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(75b4d7b2a6f686b3bb07568fff69aea3).jpg)
“Are you running away from something or going to something?”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrU29CcEo1NDRTcFJRSDEyZTNPQTlaOW43UERkR25idVBnOURiMWFsbFk4ZQ%3D%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(bfbed8a23019d8f94f346f1a3a091d58).jpg)
(to a car park attendant)
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMODQwQWkwWHRFNFU1cnVEbmRIS3p3QTZicllkRGJDRGNjOTJpTUo4N2VoS01pNDFVcXlSenlxT1JPVTlSaGRIMmhFZ0tBdEthWUZMcnl3b2dZQ21tbjg9/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(f7784950620632cd14e75ee9eb2b829a).jpg)
“Can you tell the difference between them?”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrUTRQOGo2MVlwYmI2ekRyV1M3Sk1iSUJVTFJ0MTNxNytXbHFOMld5cHZ2cGV3TjFLbFhIVTVlZVI0cTRnWGJqdUE9PQ%3D%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(91f4d27d8db2f2ef06a91270a7a3f6f4).jpg)
(pointing at identical Australian marsupials)
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMNXFRSnM4S3ZObWFxc0VDNDEzcFVqaXROMjdJYk1DanRhd1o1MnZvSG5ibXJvUnRMVy9tSmdTd1RQdUVWTE5QNnM4dnYvc0dCcXRVaTNPa0NHSG5mNnM9/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(bb4cd086874d265e99e7565f33e23cfe).jpg)
“Yak, yak, yak; come on, get a move on.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMOHk2U0JmenNwU0pDeG4rZGFPOEIrSWdNSUxQSmpxUVN0VFlQOWNJVFBSV3NPbGZ6YlB5OFgxcWc1blVWQ2dHUFFjenp3SUVnVGhtcGlsa1FFaWViOElpdDNYTkNRNWJPYVZiWGt0ZEFVMTBiUnBrTWVMc0FNU1J6VkQ1c2d4QnhRPT0%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(d4ad36c574fa4393b4b6d0fbcf9668a6).jpg)
“How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to pass the test?”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVDh2VGVaNnp1cVk3TnJ5Q2tROXVMenVRbHFveGU4SWpqcFJZUFBxR2RRRUtSWjloOVRDSzd4UlZDemV0WlJKL2c9PQ%3D%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(82e55d70d942ba08b298298dc6a3ad14).jpg)
(to a Scottish driving instructor)
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMM1IzUU96L01HNmtwQThVVzZab2x1YkgzMldoN0tNL3lTeXpwRFo0bFRFSnZYYzhwN21uU1JmZEJJYTBYTmg0ZG42NHZlYzkrUktkWnV4dHBPcEdVK2QyVDl6Qmp1THp1RlVweHZOZVRZRFQ%3D/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(bc6e0730d1d7a0273dc5be62f9c1a88f).jpg)
“If you stay here much longer, you’ll all be slitty-eyed.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMzUrdklkcjAwQWs2MFYzME9MOC95U0VzendxaVFYNWR2SW91RGVXMmExYnZiK1k1b1dBWENCTzhxVjcra0QzVU1RRlFMVkt4dGNqQTNyd0dzdlBJL1NIa0dldUMwNEZpN0tNUnN4bGs3UjlYZzJxbCt0WTgwcysxSy9VbGMweXU3QzZkcVI1ZW4vWXFwWWJISmpaSjB0NWMvTXVMR1dQYXZaeG5ua0lQNzJYTnB6ejFXWlZzVWMvNjliOTdXRXQ4dz09/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(45904178e704c15e4b4426153df22173).jpg)
“When a man talks dirty to a woman, it’s sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it’s $95 per minute.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMMGJZUy82dS9ZTDVEd2xGZ3dhWWFaUDZ2MWxIVUtKTTFXcElwMkovNjYzSjJJTk11Q2d2VjVTZjk0RU0yOWxkdTlYWHhJR3c3enc1bWh1M0FkRkNQbjQ9/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(c83b0fbd00b5ff22f3c9a0823faf8d0f).jpg)
“There’s a lot of your family in tonight.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/amk5L3IxQm1SbkRHeGNmRDMxSXdMOXI4ZnhoNnF3NlFValFpYk1Qak5obWgvUmw1RFNHaXY2YlltZzJZUVVjOU1KbGNGMXA1V2p4VGZOZWhvUlVzRkFiVEc4d3p1Qk1hbFhTT0xaNlJVeXM9/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(b7f3f3a65edd68032a83a718b013f15e).jpg)
“It looks as though it was put in by an Indian.”
![](https://imi.abcradio.fm/quotes/preview/dTB4cGRsem5DcWlBMGVROWZJVXQrVU1IRmJDTXZJcVZpRUtXcGdHRVZSNkF5NGNDUUxta3VWdTNyVndHS3FPZEpES3lLelllTGUrOVpmNEw0NjlYWFduNlRyUkx5L01TZWw0U1crQ2FnNnM9/PRINCE+PHILIP+QUOTES+FUNNY/(ee9e9979a262c65c0272a9f5486e1b5f).jpg)
(referring to an outdated fuse box in a factory)