PRINCE PHILIP QUOTES FUNNY

Here are 23 funny quotes from Prince Philip:

“Gentlemen, I think it’s about time we got out.”

(while at a recession)

“If you travel as much as we do, you appreciate that a good toilet seat is a guarantee of happiness.”

“If it has four legs and is not a chair, has wings and is not an aeroplane, or swims and is not a submarine, the Cantonese will eat it.”

“The Philippines must be half empty as you’re all here running the NHS!”

(during a visit to a hospital staffed by Filipino nurses)

“It’s my custom to say something flattering to begin with, so I shall be excused if I put my foot in it later on.”

“I declare this thing open, whatever it is.”

“If you see a man opening a car door for a woman, it means one of two things: it’s either a new woman or a new car!”

“British women can’t cook.”

(during a cooking demonstration in Hungary)

“When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.”

“It’s all about the beer and the free barley sandwiches.”

“It’s a pleasant change to be in a country that isn’t ruled by its people.”

“Do you still throw spears at each other?”

“What do you gargle with, pebbles?” FAMOUS LOYALTY QUOTES

“You are a woman, aren’t you?”

(asking a Kenyan woman who handed him a small gift)

“I would like to go to Russia very much – if the bastards would let me in.”

“Are you running away from something or going to something?”

(to a car park attendant)

“Can you tell the difference between them?”

(pointing at identical Australian marsupials)

“Yak, yak, yak; come on, get a move on.”

“How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to pass the test?”

(to a Scottish driving instructor)

“If you stay here much longer, you’ll all be slitty-eyed.”

“When a man talks dirty to a woman, it’s sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it’s $95 per minute.”

“There’s a lot of your family in tonight.”

“It looks as though it was put in by an Indian.”

(referring to an outdated fuse box in a factory)