REALLY STUPID QUOTES THAT MAKE NO SENSE

“I’m not lazy, I’m just conserving energy.”

“If life gives you lemons, throw them at someone.”

“I talk to myself because sometimes I need expert advice.”

“I put my phone on airplane mode, but it never took off.”

“I’m not clumsy, the floor just hates me.”

“I wish I could mute people in real life.”

“I believe in luck, how else can you explain the success of stupid people?”

“Why fall in love when you can fall asleep?”

“I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.”

“Great minds think alike, but fools rarely differ.”

“I’m not short, I’m just vertically efficient.” BEAUTY IS RELATIVE QUOTES

“I may be quiet, but my mind is incredibly loud.”

“I can resist everything except temptation, but I can also resist temptation.”

“I serve sarcasm on a silver platter.”

“I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.”

“My patience is as thin as my google search history.”

“Love is blind, marriage is an eye-opener.”

“Chocolate comes from cocoa, which is a tree, so it’s a plant. Therefore, chocolate counts as a salad.”

“When nothing goes right, go left.”

“I’m not weird, I’m just a limited edition.”