SIMPSONS QUOTES ABOUT LIFE

“Do not let the fear of failure keep you from playing the game.” – Lisa Simpson

“Trying is the first step towards failure.” – Homer Simpson

“Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.” – Bart Simpson

“Life is just one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.” – Homer Simpson

“Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.” – Homer Simpson

“Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.” – Homer Simpson

“In this house, we obey the laws of thermodynamics!” – Lisa Simpson

“The only reason I’m going to school is to get a job so I don’t have to go to school anymore.” – Bart Simpson

“I’m not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I’m going to Hell?” – Homer Simpson

“Remember, the Chinese use the same word for ‘crisis’ as they do for ‘opportunity.’ In fact, ‘crisitunity’ isn’t even a real word.” – Homer Simpson

“I’m not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.” – Homer Simpson

“I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.” – Homer Simpson

“The answers to life’s problems aren’t at the bottom of a bottle, they’re on TV!” – Homer Simpson

“Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer, but not too close, or they’ll see you’re inside their enemy fence.” – Bart Simpson SHORT QUOTES FAITH

“The only choice kids should have is whether to buy a Diablo or a Diablo Slurpee.” – Marge Simpson

“It takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.” – Homer Simpson

“To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.” – Homer Simpson

“It’s not easy being drunk all the time. Everyone would do it if it were easy.” – Homer Simpson

“When will I learn? The answers to life’s problems aren’t at the bottom of a bottle… they’re on TV!” – Homer Simpson

“I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me Superman!” – Homer Simpson

“Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.” – Homer Simpson

“If something goes wrong at the plant, blame the guy who can’t speak English.” – Mr. Burns

“The human mind is a labyrinth of complexity and nuance… Oops, almost sounded like Sideshow Bob there.” – Krusty the Clown

“It’s not denial. I’m just selective about the reality I accept.” – Homer Simpson

“You don’t win friends with salad!” – Homer Simpson

“I’m having the best day of my life and I owe it all to not going to church!” – Homer Simpson