STOP QUOTES FUNNY

“At my age, getting lucky means finding my car keys.” – Unknown

“I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy-saving mode.” – Unknown

“I’m not clumsy, I’m just on a mission to rearrange everything on the floor.” – Unknown

“I’m not shy, I’m just holding back my awesomeness, so I don’t intimidate you.” – Unknown

“I follow the three R’s of living – Receiving, Recycling, and Regifting.” – Unknown

“When life gives you lemons, sell them and buy a cupcake.” – Unknown

“My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.” – Unknown

“I put the ‘Pro’ in procrastinate.” – Unknown

“Seriously, if I was any lazier, I would be in a coma.” – Unknown

“I don’t trip, I do random gravity checks.” – Unknown

“I don’t need an inspirational quote, I need coffee.” – Unknown

“I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.” – Unknown

“My wallet is like an onion. Opening it makes me cry.” – Unknown

“I’m not fat, I’m just easier to see.” – Unknown QUOTES ON BEWAFA IN ENGLISH

“Exercise? I thought you said extra fries.” – Unknown

“I love my job only when I’m on vacation.” – Unknown

“The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.” – Lucille Ball

“Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.” – Unknown

“I’m not saying I hate mornings, but I’m definitely not a ‘jump-out-of-bed-and-seize-the-day’ kind of person.” – Unknown

“I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.” – Unknown

“I’m sorry for what I said when I was hungry.” – Unknown

“I don’t have a beer belly, I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs.” – Unknown

“I’m not aging, I’m ripening with a funky smell.” – Unknown

“I was born to be wild, but only until about 9 pm or so.” – Unknown

“Common sense is like deodorant, the people who need it the most never use it.” – Unknown

“I don’t need a hairstylist; my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.” – Unknown