WAITING FOR YOU FUNNY QUOTES

“I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode.”

“I’m not clumsy, I’m just hugging the floor.”

“I’m not a procrastinator, I’m just overqualified in the art of doing nothing.”

“Do I run? Yes, out of patience.”

“I’m not late, everyone else is just too early.”

“I’m not short, I’m vertically challenged.”

“I’m not a morning person, I’m a mourning person.”

“I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.”

“Of course, I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.”

“I don’t need a hairstylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.”

“I don’t snore, I dream that I’m a motorcycle.”

“I’m not a pessimist, I’m just fluent in sarcasm.”

“I don’t need a personal trainer, my fridge is watching my weight.”

“I’m not addicted to coffee, we’re just in a committed relationship.”

“I’m not lost, I’m just in a place that Google Maps can’t find.” KARMA BEST REVENGE QUOTES

“I don’t sunburn, I just spontaneously combust under the sun.”

“I’m not clumsy, I’m just testing gravity.”

“I don’t need a reason to smile, I have dimples.”

“I don’t believe in luck, I believe in snacks that magically appear in my hands.”

“I’m not a control freak, I just know how things should be done.”

“I don’t need an alarm clock, my ideas wake me up.”

“I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.”

“I don’t have a dad bod, I have a father figure.”

“I’m not forgetful, I have selective memories.”

“I don’t snore, I dream of being a chainsaw.”

“I’m not addicted to social media, I just have an intimate relationship with my phone.”

“I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy-saving mode.”

“I’m not short-tempered, I just have a quick reaction to stupidity.”

“I’m not old, I’m just vintage and full of character.”