WEIGHT LOSS FUNNY DIET QUOTES

“I’m on that new diet where I eat everything and hope for a miracle.” – Unknown

“My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. I call it lunch.” – Unknown

“I’m not overweight. I’m just nine inches too short.” – Shelley Winters

“I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.” – Tommy Cooper

“I’m not losing weight. I’m getting rid of it. I have no intention of finding it again.” – Unknown

“I’m in shape. Round is a shape, isn’t it?” – Unknown

“I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.” – Unknown

“Dieting is easy. It’s like riding a bike. Except the bike is on fire. And the ground is on fire. And everything is on fire because you’re in hell.” – Unknown

“The only exercise I do is running late.” – Unknown

“I’m on a diet, I can only have one cheat day a week. Unfortunately, Monday to Friday are usually cheat days.” – Unknown

“I tried to lose weight once. It didn’t work. So now I’m a heavyweight champion in self-acceptance.” – Unknown

“I’m challenging myself to eat healthy for a week. After that, I’m going back to my regular junk food diet.” – Unknown HATERS WILL ALWAYS HATE QUOTES

“I’m on that new diet where you eat everything that’s in your pantry and then start your diet tomorrow.” – Unknown

“I’m on a 12-step program to avoid ever going on a diet.” – Unknown

“I’m on a see-food diet. Every time I see food, I eat it!” – Unknown

“I’m not losing weight, I’m just getting a head start on hibernation season.” – Unknown

“I’m aiming for skinny, but I’ll settle for quirky.” – Unknown

“I’ve decided to treat my body like a temple. A temple to all-you-can-eat buffets.” – Unknown

“I’m on a new diet where I eat whatever I want and blame it on my metabolism.” – Unknown

“If you eat something and nobody sees you, it has no calories.” – Unknown

“I’m on that new diet where you eat everything that’s left in your fridge and call it ‘reducing food waste’.” – Unknown

“I’m not fat. I’m just easy to see.” – Unknown