“People at school think I’m a bit of a dick – and then they meet my dad.”

“I am not, and never will be, one of those lads who goes around saying stuff like ‘decent’.”

“I have never been frightened by loud noises. Apart from the time I accidentally downloaded that Rihanna album.”

“I’m not being racist, but people who say they’re not racist are just racists in denial.”

“I have always believed that you shouldn’t judge people by the color of their skin, but by the size of their breasts.”

“I’m basically a feminist. I mean, I’m always pulling chicks.”

“There is only one thing I’m less interested in than you, and that’s soccer. And I hate soccer.”

“Have you picked up any major STDs lately? I know you’re quite a sportsman.”

“Who needs to go to America? They’ve got Harvester there. They came over here and saw Harvester and thought, ‘Well, that’s good. Let’s keep Kent!'”

“I don’t need a gap year. I’m already gifted.”

“If I had to choose between my friends and my iPhone, I’d choose my iPhone. Because at least my iPhone doesn’t give me crap all the time.”

“I’m not just any student. I’m a leader. I’m like a lion, leading a pride. A really cool lion. Like Simba, but with better hair.” SHORT QUOTES IN SPANISH WITH ENGLISH TRANSLATION

“I may not be the best at everything, but I’m pretty damn close.”

“I might not have a degree yet, but I’m already a master at life.”

“I’m not a drinker. I’m a social liver destroyer.”

“I’m not the type of guy who runs away from a fight. I’m the type of guy who punches people and runs away.”

“I’m allergic to bullsh*t. And peanuts. But mostly bullsh*t.”

“I may act like an idiot, but I’m a lovable idiot.”

“I don’t need to study. I’m naturally intelligent. It’s like a gift, really.”

“I may not be a straight-A student, but I’m definitely a straight-up legend.”

“Some people call me arrogant. I prefer to think of myself as confidently unaware of other people’s opinions.”

“I don’t need to try hard to impress people. I’m naturally impressive. It’s like a superpower.”